How about I Don’t and say I did?

In the sacred temple of leftovers, a realm both frost and stale, A bi-monthly ritual unfolds, a saga of epic scale.

Behold the fridge, a cavernous expanse of shelves and drawers, Where comestibles coalesce, a culinary folklore.

The mighty battle begins, as Tupperware titans clash, Leftovers of yesteryears, entwined in a frigid, plastic flash.

With a warrior's fervor, armed with bleach and sponge in hand, I embark upon this quest, a cleaning crusade so grand.

The half-empty condiment bottles, relics of feasts long past, Each clinging to the door, a flavor ghost, a condiment cast.

The vegetable graveyard, where greens morph to spectral hues, A compost choir, singing tales of wilted lettuce blues.

With righteous fervor, I face the spillage of sauces, An unholy confluence, a rainbow of culinary losses.

The shelf of expiration, a graveyard of edibles departed, Each item a memento mori, a reminder of time imparted.

And lo, the freezer, a frosty Narnia of frozen delights, Frigid kingdoms of ice cream and frostbitten frostbite.

But hark! The arrival of grocery spoils, a parade of paper bags, Each crinkling with the promise of replenished foodie flags.

The unpacking begins, a ceremonial unveiling, Crisp veggies emerge, a verdant phoenix, never failing.

Dairy delights, a calcium cavalcade, a lactose jubilation, Milk cartons and cheeses, a dairy constellation.

In the vegetable crisper, a symphony of crunch, Celery, carrots, and cucumbers in a crisp lunch.

The eggs, delicate orbs in a carton ballet, A fragile ovum minuet, a dance of gastronomy at bay.

With ceremonial precision, each item finds its place, A choreography of groceries, a domestic ballet's embrace.

And so, the bi-monthly opera of fridge and food unfolds,

In this culinary theater, where groceries meet their fate, I, the epicurean hero, conquer the chaos, triumphant, great.

I FUCKING HATE cleaning out my refrigerator, a task I choose to skip more often than anyone should. This was written in response to a prompt given by Logophobic that served as a reminder that I haven’t done it STILL after being on the list of “shit that needs done around here" for a while now. So thanks for that, friend.