How a Teacher’s Criticism Defined My Life Path, Twice

One person’s opinion is just that, one person’s opinion.

It was a normal day at school for the 12 years old me. I was happy, curious, excited to learn new things.

Little did I know that day would impact my subconscious mind so strongly that it would define the course of my life.

We were in Literature class and that day we would receive the results of our essay papers. I loved this class, I loved the teacher, and couldn’t wait to get my paper back.

The teacher, this sweet and loving middle-aged woman, took the time to hand all our papers at our desk, sharing a few words of feedback herself.

When she reached my desk, she said:

“Adele, I helped you with some extra points to get an A Minus. Because you are an excellent student, but you are not creative.”

She was saying that she cared about me and had been generous by giving me extra points. She also complimented me by saying that I was an excellent student.

My mind heard only “you are not creative” though. They say that nothing someone says before the word ‘but’ really counts. And this was exactly the case for me.

The only thing that counted for my subconscious mind that day was:

“You Are Not Creative!”

Although I don’t remember focusing on it, getting sad or upset about it. I remember I only felt grateful to the teacher which hadn’t ruined my average grade.

And then completely forgot about this. I continued to be an excellent student, I was first in my class always, went to university for computer science and continued to build a tech career.

14 years later, when I was 26 I did a hypnotherapy session trying to unlock limiting beliefs I had picked up as a child. The very first memory I got was this one. And it was shocking to realize that I had completely forgotten about it.

But the belief was inside me, stronger than ever. Up until that point I always saw myself as a science person, a logical student, a technical professional, and as someone who wasn’t creative.

While processing this memory, I found out that since that day, all my school and career related decision had been impacted by this belief.

• I’m not creative, so I should focus on the science subjects at school.
• I’m not creative, so I should go and study computer science.
• I’m not creative, so I should choose a tech career.

Decisions that created a path that I love, and I’m very blessed to have. And it is a path I would choose again and again if I was given the option.

But what would change if I believed I was creative too? At the end of the day, that was only one person’s opinion about one essay of the 12 years old me.

Now that I was 26, confident and self-aware, I had the full power to change this belief. And that’s what I did. Since that day I started telling myself a new belief.

“I’m Very Creative!”

To make it real (and secretly to test if it was true), I decided to launch a few creative projects for myself.

• I started a side-hustle business.
• I created the website myself from scratch where I designed every section, every image, every poster, every infographic, every social media post.
• I started writing daily on LinkedIn and build an audience of 30k followers.

Three steps that created the opportunity for me to move to London, build a successful business, get two promotions at my tech career, and improve my finances significantly.

Learning how that comment from my teacher had impacted me, made it possible for me to take all these actions purposefully and defined my life path again.

I also started some projects which weren’t about career, or success, or income.

• I did embroidery and cross-stitching and loved it. Have embroidered so many gifts and made for myself a tote bag, for which I get compliments every time I use it.
• I did pottery and loved it a little less, but had tons of fun with friends.
• I learned interior design and redecorated my apartments.
• I transformed my personal fashion style and gained confidence in my appearance.
• I tried painting, drawing, photography, improv theatre.

I’m 30 now and in these four years these creative activities have enriched my life and made me a more well-rounded person and my personality multidimensional.

Now I’m very grateful to God for this experience. All the years that I focused on sciences gave me my career. And now I can explore this other side of myself.

That teacher had no idea of how powerful the impact of those words were, but she transformed my life twice. Without those words, I wouldn’t be who I am today. Without those words, I wouldn’t be writing this story here on Medium now.