Honey, I Bankrupted the House Again (With Subscription Services)
I‘ve always thought of myself as a fairly responsible person, budget-wise. I can walk right past that 50% off sale sign without a second glance, and I can resist the allure of those cute shoes on the display.
But as it turns out, my personal fiscal kraken was lurking not in a shopping mall, but in the unassuming realm of online subscriptions.
You know how it goes.
One moment you’re signing up for a free trial to watch that one series everyone’s been talking about, and the next thing you know, you’re juggling Hulu, Netflix, Amazon Prime, Disney+, and about a dozen other subscriptions that have mysteriously multiplied like rabbits in your bank account.
It all started innocently.
I was sipping my morning tea, scrolling through news articles on Bing, when I stumbled upon a piece discussing the “Subscription Economy.” Apparently, people are spending an astronomical amount on subscription services. I remember chuckling to myself, thinking, “Ha! Not me. I’m not one of those suckers.”
Then came the shower revelation.
You know how showers are like a mini Zen retreat? Your mind wanders, and suddenly you’re solving the mysteries of the universe — or, in my case, you’re realizing you may, in fact, be one of those ‘suckers’ you laughed at moments before.
As I began mentally tallying up my subscriptions, I realized I needed more fingers than I possessed to count them all.
A sense of dread washed over me, and it wasn’t just from the lukewarm water. Post-shower, I embarked on a quest, navigating the labyrinth of my bank statement, tallying and re-tallying. My subscriptions were like unruly children at a party: scattered, noisy, and impossible to ignore.
Some of them weren’t even mine!
They belonged to my partner, my kids, my sister… even my mom had managed to sneak one in there. And then there were subscriptions I had completely forgotten about, like ancient relics of a past life.
I found myself personifying these subscriptions, imagining them as tiny creatures nibbling away at my bank account. And Hulu, with its endless array of shows, was the queen bee of this hive of parasites, ruling with an iron fist (or should I say, an iron remote?).
So, here’s the punchline: I, the woman who prided herself on her fiscal responsibility, was spending the equivalent of a small island nation’s GDP on subscription services.
And so, I’ve decided it’s time to show these subscription service parasites the door, starting with Hulu, but not Netflix… yet.
The moral of my tale?
Check your subscriptions, dear readers. Then check them again. And maybe, just maybe, you’ll find your own personal fiscal kraken lurking in the depths.
