Home is Where the Heart Is
And it’s not always what you think.
In high school, my English teacher had us write about home and what it meant to us. Most people wrote about their family homes and what reminded them about home. For some, it was the smell of cinnamon and apple pie. For me, I went unconventional.
It’s always been hard for me to talk about home because I largely feel like I don’t have one. Home is supposed to be this comfortable place that you can always come back to, but I don’t have that. At least not in a traditional sense.
I moved to South Carolina when I was 9 and it rocked my world. Everything I had known had been turned upside down and shaken apart. Louisiana had been my home and it was taken away from me. I didn’t have that anymore.
Somebody else lived in my childhood house, and the area changed completely after my family left. It was never something I could revisit.
But there was one thing I found myself returning to time and time again: music.
Music has been a huge part of my life, ever since I was 9. (Funny timing, right?)
I remember walking through the schoolyard one day after chorus and seriously thinking to myself, “I could do this for the rest of my life.” At the time, I was more convinced about being a teenage pop star, but the sentiment remained.
Music has been the thing that’s kept me sane in the darkest of times. Amid my depression, I could always find solace in music. There was always someone singing about their angst, their worries, their hopes, and dreams, and it was something that spoke to something primal in me.
Every time a musical event comes along, I find myself naturally drawn towards it. I went to one of my friend’s recitals in college and the entire time I sat in my chair, entranced, getting goosebumps.
I think there’s something about musicals that everyone enjoys between singing and dancing. But whenever I find a new show or movie that revolves around it, I can’t help but watch it. Inevitably, I’m drawn to wherever the music goes.
When I need a home to return to, music is where I go. The good news about that is that I can go home no matter where I go because it’s something that I carry with me. It’s more than just a physical space for me, it’s an all-encompassing feeling.
Traditionally, home is a place, but I say we buck that narrative. You can make any place, thing, or feeling your home. It makes it so much easier to return to. You don’t have to feel pressured to have a physical space if you find your own little home.
Hopefully, everyone can find their home or make a new one, whatever it is to them.
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