Summary

The article emphasizes the importance of maintaining short, clean nails for hygiene, especially during the COVID-19 pandemic, and suggests that long nails are not only a productivity hindrance but also a health hazard.

Abstract

The author of the article, LauraMaery Gold, shares a personal perspective on the cleanliness and practicality of maintaining short nails, particularly in light of the COVID-19 pandemic. She recounts her previous envy of those with long, beautiful nails but now, with age, finds her own nails growing stronger and longer. However, she argues that longer nails are impractical for typing and can harbor dirt and bacteria, contributing to the spread of infections. Despite thorough handwashing routines, she observes that longer nails still accumulate debris and bacteria. The article suggests that nail polish may mask the unsanitary reality beneath, and advocates for a reevaluation of beauty standards, proposing that short, clean nails should be seen as a sign of hygiene and diligence. Gold encourages readers to prioritize cleanliness over length, recommending regular nail clipping and the use of bidets or hand-held squirt bottles for personal hygiene. She also provides links to relevant products and further reading on related topics.

Opinions

Long nails are viewed as a productivity killer, reducing typing speed significantly.
The CDC is cited to support the claim that long nails are dirtier and more likely to spread infections than short nails.
The author believes that even with meticulous handwashing, long nails cannot maintain the same level of cleanliness as short nails.
Nail polish is seen as a cosmetic used to hide the dirt and bacteria that can accumulate under nails.
There is a call to redefine beauty standards, suggesting that long nails should be considered unappealing due to hygiene concerns.
The article promotes the use of nail clippers and hygiene tools like bidets as part of a pro-social approach to personal cleanliness during the pandemic.
The author implies that maintaining short nails is evidence of one's commitment to hygiene and capacity for hard work.

SURVIVAL OF THE CLEANEST

Hoard Nail Clippers, Not TP

Your long nails are a health hazard. And harder to clean than your backside.

As a young woman, I envied people with long beautiful nails. I’m not naturally blessed with strong nails, and I’m allergic to most of the concoctions required to create them artificially.

Now that I’ve got some years on me, my nails are finally getting stronger and longer.

This is not a good thing.

**The shorter, the cleaner.** (Image par Kuradomova de Pixabay)

Not only because long nails are a productivity killer (I’m a 90wpm typist in short nails; I drop to 70wpm in slightly longer nails, and about 50wpm in nails that extend beyond my fingertips. I imagine if I had longer talons, it’d drop to 20wpm).

But because COVID-19.

Long nails are gross and dirty. The CDC agrees with me. All fingernails “harbor dirt and germs and … contribute to the spread of some infections, such as pinworms,” they say. But longer fingernails “harbor more dirt and bacteria than short nails, thus potentially contributing to the spread of infection.”

Despite my meticulous and frequent hand washing, when my nails get a bit longer than short, throughout the day the undersides begin to grow a bit gray, and start to collect discolored goop. And I’m someone who’s actually good and persistent at handwashing. I’m the person who puts in a full 20 seconds, lathers up her thumbs, and washes to her wrists. In the shower, I use a soapy nail brush. But by the time the next night’s shower rolls around, those nails just aren’t so shiny clean.

If you don’t see the goop growing under your own nails between showers, I’m going to guess it might be because your nails are covered in thick paint that hides the ugly truth. Nail polish isn’t just purdy…It hides goop, just as perfume was originally designed to hide stench.

I’m the person who puts in a full 20 seconds, lathers up her thumbs, and washes to her wrists. In the shower, I use a soapy nail brush. It’s not enough.

Maybe it’s time for fashionable folk to rethink what it means to be beautiful. Perhaps long, dirty skin slashers should be viewed as hideous atrocities, and short, clean, clear nails as evidence of hygiene and the capacity for hard work.

In this time of lockdown and isolation, where people are stripping the shelves of toilet paper, and in the spirit of pro-social behavior, let me propose the following:

Buy nailclippers for every member of your family.
Relieve yourself of whatever gunk lives on the topside of your nails.
Clip those monsters off and be free.
With your new short nails, clean your backside with either a bidet or a hand-held squirt bottle.
Soap, lather, soap, lather. (The CDC explains handwashing.)

More from this writer

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The Relationship Institute uses a martial-arts metaphor to coach relationship, communication, and life skills. Visit our digital library, schedule training events, and sign up for our newsletter to receive free therapeutic advice for improving your relationships.

LauraMaery Gold, LMFT, is a licensed marriage and family therapist working with couples and parents, and writes for Relating magazine. She is also executive director of The Relationship Institute and the author of oh-so-very-many books on family concerns. When all seven of their kids became adults, she and her husband took up residence in a 400-year-old castle just outside of Paris.

* Note: My articles probably contain affiliate links to books or other products I own, use, and love. If I ever earn back what I’ve spent, I’ll very likely buy myself…well, another book that I’ll undoubtedly reference in a future article. This is a very bad way to get rich.