Go to the Farm

Pick Your Peril: The Hero of Mudtown

(This is part of a series of choose-your-own-adventure articles. If you want to start from the beginning, click here.)

The perils you’ve faced today have been more than enough to put you off the adventurer’s lifestyle. You decide that the life of a pig is much more appealing. No matter how short it is, at least you’ll be fed and cared for.

The path up to the farm is well-maintained, free of weeds or loose stones. The other pigs squash together against the fence to get a good look at you as you approach, oinking curiously. You walk right up to the front door, scraping at it with your little cloven hoof and oinking loudly. A hunched old man opens the door and smiles when he sees you sitting there.

“Did this little piggy get loose?” The farmer scoops you up and takes you to the pen with the rest of the animals. He sets you down on the ground and your fellow pigs approach you with caution, sniffing inquisitively. The pigs turn out to be very welcoming, and you are accepted into swine society in no time.

You spend the rest of your days in peaceful bliss, nourished and pampered. The farmer doesn’t even slaughter or sell pigs, he just likes to keep them and feed them. Every once in a while you think about your family, but you’re a selfish little pig, and those thoughts disappear quickly as you lounge around in the muck.

It makes no difference to you if the people of Mudtown are never found, if hordes of undead march from the bog and overrun the countryside. You couldn’t care less if the kingdom collapses into chaos and all seems lost, this is the life you chose, and no calls for adventure are enough to spur you from your comfortable little spot in the mud.

THE END