Hello Mudda, Hello Faddah

Summary

The author recounts their childhood experience at a Girl Scout camp and their upcoming adult "diabetes management and wellness" retreat.

Abstract

The author, reflecting on a past experience, shares a humorous anecdote from their childhood where they unsuccessfully attempted to partake in a Girl Scout camping trip, only to escape and call their mother for a pick-up. The narrative then shifts to the present, where the author is preparing to attend an adult wellness retreat, highlighting a full-circle moment with a twist of humor and a nod to personal growth and health management.

Opinions

The author is not fond of outdoor camping, as indicated by their preference for indoor activities and the humorous tone used to describe the camping experience.
The author values personal health and is taking steps to manage their well-being, as evidenced by their participation in the upcoming retreat.
There is a light-hearted critique of the term "fat camp," with the author preferring the more euphemistic description of "diabetes management and wellness retreat for adults."
The author seems to appreciate the convenience of modern technology, contrasting their past reliance on payphones with the present-day resources for health monitoring.
The author may be poking fun at their younger self's dramatic escape from camp, as well as their mother's initial lack of recognition during the collect call, using it as a humorous hashtag, #parentinggoals.

Here I am at Camp Saladda

I’m indoorsy.

When I was ten, my mother insisted I go camping in the woods with my Girl Scout troop. Immediately, I knew living off the land was not for me, despite the opportunity to earn the coveted dig-your-own-privy badge.

I made a break for it and found my way back to civilization. Thank goodness, pay phones were ubiquitous in the 70s.

Operator: Will you accept a collect call from A.J. who says it’s an emergency and needs you to pick her up immediately?

My Mom: Who?

#parentinggoals

Fast-forward forty-eight years.

Starting Monday, I’ll be at fat camp. Or a “diabetes management and wellness” retreat for adults, if you’re fancy.

Everything is inside.

A glucose monitoring badge awaits me.

Wish me luck!