September 19, 2022

Height Matters: My Journey to Self-Acceptance

When I was young, my height negatively influenced how I saw myself. But then, I changed.

My younger self was insecure. I hated being tall. It seemed like only the average height or shorter girls were popular. I wanted people to see me. I wanted small feet!

It’s all about popular It’s not about aptitude It’s the way you’re viewed So it’s very shrewd to be Very very popular

Lyrics from Popular, song written by Kristin Chenoweth and sung in the play, Wicked

In primary school, I vividly remember all the kids (read: the boys) crowding around one girl, in particular. She was so short and cute. I recall shrinking to the furthest ring of the gathering, hating my height. Cute was never an adjective I would use to describe myself. I felt I stuck out and could only wear ugly shoes — men-sized shoes, I thought.

I was not aware of how people saw me. I lived in my head.

In my teens, a boy liked me — he was shorter than me, though. I remembered walking in the city and refusing to hold his hand. I thought we looked weird and hated that I was not shorter. Although he insisted he loved me the way I was, I could not, would not, stay in that relationship.

I wasted so much time.

At some point, the height of my personality grew taller. My essence bloomed after I claimed my confidence. I came to understand that the way I present myself in the world affects how people perceive me. I emanated what I truly believed — I’m kind, witty, loving, bright, and encapsulated in this beautiful body is all that goodness!

I attracted terrific people, grew up, and found super cute shoes.

Now, I appreciate my height and the way I am. When I came into my self-acceptance, I oozed confidence. I find people want to be around me. I love being tall. It’s a power I wield with grace and ease. I purchase the shoes I want, wear the clothes that make me feel fabulous, and celebrate my unique frame!

At 20, we don’t care what the world thinks of us. At 30, we worry about what it thinks of us. At 40, we’re sure it doesn’t think of us. — Will Rogers as Kenesaw H. Clark in the film Life Begins at 40

If I could say something to my younger 6- or 16-year old self, it might be — you are beautiful the way you are; own it, girl!

© 2022 K. Joseph. All rights reserved

This article came to me at the prompting of Refresh the Soul.

🙏🏾 Thanks for reading.

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