Having Two Husbands Makes One Happy Wife!

Chronicle of an Open Marriage #27

I’m smiling this morning. Last night Captain and I had a date. Hubs said he wanted us to leave the apartment because he can’t keep up with us! We’ve had multiple threeways during which Hubs has obviously enjoyed seeing me and Captain get it on, so I asked if that feeling had changed.

“No. I still like seeing that,” he reassured. “Just not three times a week.”

So I packed a bag and Captain and I went out to the beach. At night. We’ve been there twice before when we scouted out this pretty private place. We laid a sturdy blanket on the sand and snuggled beneath a softer one on top. The stars were overhead, and he pointed out a few constellations. Our beautiful and majestic bridge winked and blinked on the horizon. A fishing boat motored by, green light shining on the starboard side. I held Captain’s face in my palms and took his lower lip between my teeth, biting gently. I moved my hands over his smooth skin beneath his shirt and pants. I looked into his happy, crinkling eyes and laughed with delight.

I love necking outside! It’s soooooo stimulating. I was wearing a skimpy sundress and no underwear. The wind kissed me all over my exposed skin and I didn’t feel a bit cold, only glad to be alive. The air smelled of water and salt and bestowed tiny wet droplets on my arms and neck and hair. The Bay lapped the shore, making a rhythmic swish swishing to underpin our explorations. And the constant sound of traffic on a nearby freeway was somehow both comforting and stimulating, too.

When we first arrived, we saw a dark shadow down the beach. Someone was out for a walk alone in the dark. So we couldn’t get down to business right away. That was okay with me. In fact, I prefer it that way. I like petting and kissing and pressing our bodies together, enjoying the feel and taste and texture of each other— a lot. I like the easy intimacy that’s created by being alone together at night outside. Being partially naked on the beach with my Captain felt both safe and a little bit dangerous — secure and a gamble, tame and wild.

I adore having two husbands.

Because, here’s the thing. My actual husband of 39 years would never neck with me on the beach. He wouldn’t want to take the risk of being seen. He wouldn’t want to be outside by the water at night. He wouldn’t even want to lie down on the sand, and I wouldn’t be able to persuade him to try it despite reservations, because after all this time, he’s immune to my charms and shows a marked resistance to my adventurous plans. But that’s okay. He has other things to commend him.

That’s okay, that is if I can have Captain, too…

And lest you think I am selfish and getting something extra unfairly, I’m not the only one with two lovers here. Hubs has both a wife and a husband. Captain does too, plus a girlfriend. Everyone’s pleasure is multiplied in our current arrangement.

We’ve had a few bumps getting here, and no doubt we will experience more. But besides the physical pleasure and emotional excitement, opening our marriage has been helping my husband and me to dismantle a dysfunctional relationship system that has been tormenting both of us for years.

The basic story of our marital dysfunction sounded like this: I felt used and Hubs felt neglected. But now, thanks in part to the counseling we’ve been getting since we opened our marriage, and in part to the exposure to other ways of being, we are changing those core feelings and the negative reactions that they bring out.

One revelation has been the way Captain likes to have sex with me. Here’s a man who likes to do many things my extremely shy husband does not. Captain likes to kiss me, for example. He likes to compliment me. He likes to look me in the eyes when he’s f**king me, and smile. And honestly, it’s been so damn long since I’ve experienced these simple pleasures that drinking them in now is intoxicating.

I brought this intel back to Hubs, who scoffed about it in counseling. “But Captain doesn’t mean it!” he said. “He’s a Casanova!”

Here’s the deal, though. Captain does mean what he says. Because I’m not asking for a lifetime commitment. Captain doesn’t have to swear he’ll never leave my side for him to be telling the truth when he says I look sexy. He’s not claiming undying love when he brushes his lips tenderly over my neck or communicates his pleasure through eye contact. None of that is a trick or a lie. It’s just a man who isn’t shy and doesn’t mind being vulnerable when having sex.

I’ve written this particular piece while in a state of blissful satisfaction, even though I promised in my last story that I’d tell you how I almost f**ked everything up! And I will tell that story, one day. It needs to be told. Because trust me, I don’t feel blissful satisfaction every morning. Some days it’s hurt feelings and insecurity and upset and jealousy and shame and confusion about whether it’s okay to disregard society’s standards.

But not today!

What happened next? Read Chronicle of an Open Marriage #28. Find all of my stories about opening our marriage on the list below, or about sex in general on this one. Get an email whenever I publish. And have a glorious day.