Have you Ever Noticed the Back Side of a Quilt

An analogy of our souls

Hope is a thing with feathers, that perches in the soul. And sings a tune without words, and never stops at all. — Emily Dickenson.

Have you ever been to ‘a quilting bee?’ Or sat with a group of women who are busy quilting together? If so, did you ever look at the back side of the quilt? Probably not because all attention is given to the top-side, the finished side, which is the one destined to be shown and admired. The back side is usually covered up by some solid colored fabric, or another quilt will be sewn onto it so both sides of the quilt will be pretty.

It was probably back in 1960' which would have made me 10 when I showed up on this particular weekday afternoon in our neighborhood Methodist church, the same one my mom belonged to and dragged my sister and I to. I had sneaked down to the basement and I was soon starring down at a finished quilt. It was obvious it had been carefully laid out on a large table, it’s unfinished side facing up.

This large basement space was full of older women I quickly decided were grandmothers, all either hand stitching, or sitting at sewing machines. I probably warned by at least one of them not to touch the quilt as I’m sure I looked somewhat bedraggled as it was Summer and I’d no doubt been out gallivanting around the neighborhood before I ended up here.

This church was never locked so kids would sometimes go in to get a drink from their water fountain. Besides it felt air conditioned so this place was a respite from the unrelenting Summer heat of Kansas. I was always on some sort of made up adventure, whether I was alone or with others so I biked or ran around a lot and back then there weren’t hardly any air conditioned homes, or businesses. My own included. This basement was a lot cooler than anywhere else so I’m sure that’s one reason I decided to sneak down there. The sound of women’s voices and my curious nature had also gotten the better of me.

At the bottom of the stairs was a large table with a quilt stretched out on it so I stepped over to look at it. I remember a woman came up to me and asked me how I liked it. I was taught to be polite to grown-ups so I probably told her I liked it and that it was very pretty, whether I really thought so, or not. I remember she then took hold of a corner of it and flipped it over which revealed the finished side which was a lot prettier. “How do you like it now?” She asked smiling at me. “It’s beautiful.” I replied. Then she got closer and said, “everyone likes the finished side, but I like the unfinished side better, want to know why?” I’m sure I replied yes, as I noticed she’d begun to run her weathered fingers over all the loose threads and knots as she said, “this side is like our souls inside our bodies. This side shows all the torn loose threads and broken stitches that are like moments in our lives, some good, some not so good and some downright ugly. This is what’s inside us while the pretty side is what we show the world.” Then she winked at me. I don’t remember if I said anything then before I scampered off, but I have never forgotten what she said because back then I was already writing some poems and I knew what she had told me was deep stuff.

Years later, after I learned to do needlepoint that old woman’s words came back to me when I’d examine the underside of my project. I was always struck by how disheveled, frayed, broken, and uneven it was. Nothing about it was pretty, but I came to see that side of it as it’s soul as I knew, just like God is the only one who can see my soul, I was the only one who would ever see this.

I knew when I finished my needlework picture I’d glue the backside to a piece of cardboard before I surrounded it with a pretty mat and then framed it. Afterwards it would be displayed on a wall where friends and family would comment on how pretty it is, while I’d smile as I’d be seeing the other side in my mind where ‘my stitches were good and not so good, and some were downright ugly.’

Have you ever thought of your life as being the other side of a tapestry, or a quilt?

I believe that’s the only side we can see now, while God sees the other side because he’s weaving each of us into a tapestry that won’t be finished until we leave this earth. The threads are our faults and failings, our disappointments and tears, our dashed hopes and dreams in with our accomplishments; our successes, our good deeds, our joys and laughter, and our love for others and together they form what becomes a beautiful tapestry and maybe someday we’ll have the privilege of seeing it. And when that moment comes I imagine everything in our lives will make make perfect sense…We’ll see how our lives became what He orchestrated them to be from start to finish, and we’ll be astounded by how beautiful our tapestries turned out to be.

Thanks for reading and thoughtful writing everyone.