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Abstract

.But he was blocked. He could never find those feelings again.He loved me, he never denied that. And would always say I was the most important person in his life after his children.But I pressured him constantly. I wanted titles. I wanted to know what we were.So, once more, we split.Almost two months later we are hanging out again.Déja vu.We go out to eat, we watch a film, we go to padel tournaments, and he calls most nights. And yes, we have sex.But this time it’s different.He tells me again he doesn’t want to be in a relationship. But also he’s not interested in anyone else while “fooling around with me”.But there are no kisses, and no hugs in the daily Encuentro.He doesn’t stay over at mine so much.There is no obligation to call. Nor do I have any clue what he is doing the majority of the time.I have no idea when we will see each other again.I have no idea if I should just close this chapter of my life and open the door to someone who thinks I am so

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special they don’t want to risk losing me.But I do know that he is not looking for anyone else.He simply does not have the space or the time.And now he wants to go away for a few days.With me.Why? I ask myself.Am I just an easy “relationship/situationship/ friendship/companion” that fits in with his complicated life?Is this the definition of breadcrumbs?Why can I not find the self-love to walk away from this incredibly anxious-provoking situation?The doctor prescribed anti-depressants/anti-anxiety pills a month ago.The psychologist suggested that instead of the pills I should just get rid of the root of the anxiety…..We all know exactly what that is.But do I have the balls?Thank you for taking the time to read this article. I hope you found it helpful and empowering. Your thoughts and experiences are valuable to me, so please feel free to share them in the comments section below. I look forward to catching up with you soon. Louise ;)</article></body>

Has my Relationship Turned into a Situationship?

I think I am more confused than him.

Photo by Misunderstood Whiskey on Unsplash

We were a couple…for almost two years. The lovey-dovey kind of couple. I didn’t believe that someone could love me so much.

But things got complicated, on his side. Ex-wife, four kids. And I demanded too much.

We split.

Shortly after we started hanging out. He told me he was happy as he was — single.

We would go to the cinema, for dinner, and he would stay at mine often. We went away for the weekend.

And gradually we would talk about trying to recuperate the relationship.

We would see each other daily because he works in the local coffee shop. We built up to kisses and hugs when we saw each other.

But he was blocked. He could never find those feelings again.

He loved me, he never denied that. And would always say I was the most important person in his life after his children.

But I pressured him constantly. I wanted titles. I wanted to know what we were.

So, once more, we split.

Almost two months later we are hanging out again.

Déja vu.

We go out to eat, we watch a film, we go to padel tournaments, and he calls most nights. And yes, we have sex.

But this time it’s different.

He tells me again he doesn’t want to be in a relationship. But also he’s not interested in anyone else while “fooling around with me”.

But there are no kisses, and no hugs in the daily Encuentro.

He doesn’t stay over at mine so much.

There is no obligation to call. Nor do I have any clue what he is doing the majority of the time.

I have no idea when we will see each other again.

I have no idea if I should just close this chapter of my life and open the door to someone who thinks I am so special they don’t want to risk losing me.

But I do know that he is not looking for anyone else.

He simply does not have the space or the time.

And now he wants to go away for a few days.

With me.

Why? I ask myself.

Am I just an easy “relationship/situationship/ friendship/companion” that fits in with his complicated life?

Is this the definition of breadcrumbs?

Why can I not find the self-love to walk away from this incredibly anxious-provoking situation?

The doctor prescribed anti-depressants/anti-anxiety pills a month ago.

The psychologist suggested that instead of the pills I should just get rid of the root of the anxiety…..

We all know exactly what that is.

But do I have the balls?

Thank you for taking the time to read this article. I hope you found it helpful and empowering. Your thoughts and experiences are valuable to me, so please feel free to share them in the comments section below. I look forward to catching up with you soon. Louise ;)