50 WORDS

Guilty & Wistful…

Thrifty Word Challenge #22: Guilty

Cheating gives me no guilt, Lying comes so naturally… The only times I‘m really honest… When I write, When I make love,

Love evades, scares, I mostly just fuck These connectionless hookups, leave me wistful Deepen the void, instead of filling it I’m fooling myself, aren’t I?

Guilty, as charged.

In all honesty, I am writing this, I cheat. To feel alive, to feel like a woman, to feel desired coz my marriage gives me none of these things. I feel no guilt about that, but I feel guilt for my own self. Hooking up and fuckbuddy arrangements only go so far, and they widen the emotional chasm. I feel I have shortchanged myself and I am guilty of that, foolishly guilty…Maybe I should try better, harder, and look for more? Am still unsure. One thing is for sure, My writing is honest…and that is my balm.

Thank you Marla Bishop for this challenge.