Summary

The article discusses the author's personal journey with grief, their discovery of its source, and the transformative process of healing through love and connection with the universe.

Abstract

The author of the article shares a profound exploration of grief, detailing their experience from teenage depression alleviated by nature to the later discovery of the root cause of their sorrow at age 39. The narrative weaves through phases of healing, including the use of substances, spiritual work, and a somatic grief process. A pivotal moment occurs when the author, unable to sleep, engages in a meditative practice that leads to an encounter with their Higher Self, resulting in an embrace of grief and a release facilitated by unconditional love. The article emphasizes the distinction between attached love, which can lead to grief, and an over-arching, unconditional love that transcends loss and integrates all experiences of love into a harmonious whole. The author describes a physical manifestation of grief as shredded brown paper within their body, which is ultimately dissolved by the light of joy and unconditional love, leading to a sense of freedom and peace.

Opinions

The author believes that wilderness and Earth's natural beauty served as a healing balm for their wounds during their teenage years.
They suggest that substances like alcohol and marijuana can mask grief but do not address its underlying causes.
The author posits that spiritual and inner work provide a foundation for understanding and processing grief.
They introduce a somatic grief process as a method for addressing the physical effects of grief.
The author expresses a belief in the concept of Higher Self and its role in personal healing and enlightenment.
They convey that unconditional love is a powerful force that can embrace and transform grief into peace and freedom.
The author implies that all forms of love, including those that cause

Greater Love

embracing grief

Greater Love

Imagine hugging Earth and her moon and include yourself being hugged. Extend the hug to the Solar System, then the galaxy, then the universe, then the multiverses… Love is.

Inside Grief

When I was a teen I was inside grief, constantly sad, longing for death, and oh so serious. Had I known the word: “depression” I would have labelled myself as such. I was surrounded by family and wilderness. Wilderness saved me — Earth was (is) a balm for my wounds.

A Silver Lining

Nature Befriended Me

medium.com

The newness of college, friends, alcohol, marijuana, and being away from family brought back the happiness of pre-teen life. The substances masked the grief.

By the time I had discovered the source of the grief I had had 15 years of spiritual/inner work as a foundation and an eternal sense of being to assist me.

It wasn’t until age 39 that I found the the source of the grief.

Before ‘75 I was the grief, after ‘91 I felt the grief. I began the first phase of a healing process.

Somatic Grief Process

Since 2019 I’ve been shedding the effects of the physical manifestations of the grief. In the last few months I’ve found a new way to look at my being by practicing holding three thoughts within myself simultaneously and connecting to Earth’s grid. I have yet to be completely successful at this practice.

Joy Entered and Filled Me

The other night I woke around 3 am and was unable to fall back to sleep. Instead I went into a meditative breath process that evolved into the 3-Thoughts Inner Practice. My inner voice alerted me, a few Guides came in and I was filled with Light and Joy.

I Asked

The answer came with an action — from my Higher Self. Photons expanded as a column of light around my body and I embraced the shredded fragments of grief from my awareness. When Jesus protected me when I was 4 years old (see The Jesus Drawer by another title — story) He sequestered the physical manifestation of the grief until the time I could deal with it and understand it.

Loving someone

Makes grief inevitable.

When I have fallen in-love, grown in a relationship of love grief never enters my awareness. I am attached to my beloved, my family, pets. When I have felt loss, whether it was the wounding from sexual abuse (betrayal of love), the death of my parents, break-ups with lovers, the death of a lover — all these are love of —

An Over-arching Love or Unconditional Love

That belongs to the infinite of beingness has no attachment.

Being and unconditional Love embraces the hurt of grief and links all the love woven with the golden threads of a Higher Love that binds all attached love together as one. From the “place” of unconditional Love beyond space-time attached loves are never lost and grief melts into love and releases the past memories of the hurt.

Being includes all there is. It’s not just the good stuff. It’s the “negative” and the hurt. Being Loves — everything, everywhere, always.

Grief as a Physical Manifestation

A day after I wrote the story “Knowing They Know that You Know” I “saw” Jesus’s eternal love and the physical manifestation on the grief that has existed all these years with the unconditional Love from Jesus. I’m sure most everyone knows that sometimes packages are padded with long brown strips of paper. That’s what this grief looked like: shredded brown paper that extended from the base of my throat down to my naval (2nd Chakra).

The Joy and Light embraced the shredded brown paper of grief that had been fixed in my body so long ago. The Light of Unconditional Love and Joy expanded to include my body and embraced the brown fragments of grief and brought them home. I was freed and at peace.

It felt so good, I fell asleep without knowing that I had fallen asleep.

Thanks to all for the inspiration and support