HUMOR
Great news, the raccoon living in my basement is a Pisces!
You’ll never guess his moon placement
Last week I was horrified to find that a raccoon had moved into my basement. The idea that a wild animal who might be aggressive, or god-forbid even an extraverted Leo, was nesting in my winter duvet was super unsettling. Imagine my relief upon discovering that this raccoon is clearly a gentle Pisces. Here are some of the benefits to living with this fish-like dreamer.
They bring their eclectic taste
The raccoon has moved a large number of items (several old glass bottles, a corn cob, half a dozen chicken bones) over behind the water heater. His aesthetic is nostalgic and unconventional. It’s giving me an urban-outfitters-but-cooler vibe. I did see that he had borrowed (and consumed) my strawberry lip gloss without asking, but that’s to be expected from a sign ruled by impulsive Neptune.
They are the most caring sign
Like all Pisces, the raccoon is selflessly generous. Just yesterday, I saw that he had ripped apart a package of toilet tissue. I was about to leave a note about keeping common spaces clean, when I saw that he had created a home for a family of mice. That kind of awareness and altruism is what makes Pisces such great friends. I noticed he also shredded the paper towels to make a bed for himself, which is another good sign; self-care is important.
They are artists at heart
He has opened all the old cans of paint and tracked them all over. There are paw prints on the walls, the water heater, even the ceiling. It’s as if he spent hours just running in a rabid state before crawling under the oil tank covered in dust and Benjamin Moore Premium in Sea Breeze. This investment in manifesting his artistic vision tells me that he’s a March Pisces, which honestly is fantastic because while I love artsy roommates I need them to have some grounded traits. This is a raccoon that isn’t just about dreaming, he’s about creating those dreams.
They don’t hide their feelings
This raccoon feels deeply, which I as a Scorpio understand. The past two nights he has been letting himself sit in some difficult emotions, screeching and wailing from 12am-5am. I wanted to ask him what was going on, but when I poked my head down he hissed at me so I’ll let him come to me when he’s ready to share.
As emotional as living with Piscean energy can be, it’s nice to have a sensitive roommate who isn’t afraid to show care. Sure, one minute he’s tearing up my old picture albums for a future collage, or shitting in my seasonal decorations (I’m not sure what project that one was for), but some nights I wake up and he’s snuggled on my pillow watching me as I sleep. Obviously, as two water signs, we’re going to have to have a talk about boundaries.