Going Back to The Old Homestead and How It Made Me Feel
Have you ever returned to a house that wasn't supposed to be changed in your mind?
Have you ever returned to a childhood home after being away for many years? Maybe the first home that you bought, but you last saw it a long time ago. You have a picture in your head and your heart of what this house looks like. The only stable and consistent home for me was my grandparent's home.
The first time I revisited as an adult, there was new siding, and dormers were added. It looked good. I approved of this facelift, and my grandma liked it. My grandpa had passed, and my grandma had moved within walking distance of her church; she didn't drive. The new owners had given Grandma a tour. She told me about some of the changes they made inside. This was a small town where everybody knew everybody. The yard looked much smaller than I remembered as a child. I used to play croquet in the sideyard, and it felt like a football field.
The last time I visited was to put a wreath on my grandma's grave. And I wanted my husband to see the Lovering homestead. That was how it was always referred to. We took a drive and parked in front. I was so upset. My husband asked what was wrong. Well, the newest owner built a garage and put it on the wrong side of the house. The driveway that I knew was on the other side of the house. And this garage was huge. If it was a little garage where the old driveway was, I could accept the addition of a garage. This garage was built to house a semi.
How dare someone change my memories! Have you ever experienced this? I felt like my childhood had been removed. But that wasn't all. The tree my grandpa had hung a swing from for me was gone.
Now, we're not done yet. The garage was sitting where my grandma's flower garden was. Grandma had such a green thumb, which I sadly didn't inherit. At this point, my husband just took me in his arms and told me he understood. He had gone through something similar with his mom's house. Then, I felt like he was the only one who understood.
If you have ever experienced a feeling like this, I would love to hear about it.