Getting Combative As A Leader

What should you do if you get combative with a direct report?

Today, during my staff meeting, I responded more sternly than I should have to one of the new leaders on my team.

Immediately after I did it, the leader private messaged me to say he didn’t appreciate how I responded. I’m glad he did.

This is one of my growth areas. Resisting the urge to get combative. I don’t like this trait, and I’m working diligently to control it.

What frustrates me about this occurrence is that it could undermine a crucial team-building goal. I’m sabotaging my interests. To encourage open and honest conversations.

But my response today discourages it.

Thankfully this leader called me on it with his IM. Realizing my mistake, I typed back an apology. Then I took it a step further.

I paused the agenda and apologized to the leader as soon as I could.

I took ownership of my mistake. I acknowledged it was inappropriate and not in keeping with what we were trying to do as a team.

I’ve never apologized “publicly” like that before. It certainly wasn’t comfortable for me. And the voice in my head was warning me I was making a mistake.

I don't know if it was. But to my staff’s credit, and that leader, they responded with respect and grace.

And I’m thankful for that.