Full Moon

A poem

Full Moon

I can feel it

Every time

The same thing is brought up for healing

I would if I had any idea how

And what is my why?

I did the best I could at the time

And I tried to do the “right thing”

Removing myself from deep misunderstanding

From being judged

And triggered

And generally not a healthy connection

Though in different circumstances it could have been

I tried to steer it there

I actually did try

I hated how I felt

I felt crazy

And in the end I felt so bad

For a lot of different reasons

It was fun and then it wasn’t

I had to go

It might only have been for a while

While I got myself straight

That’s how I saw things

But you stuck the knife in once

Avoidably

Then again and again

I don’t think you knew what was what either

But you’d better believe it wasn’t what you thought it was.

I was actually a good friend

Because I knew when I wasn’t being

And it was time to go

Because you deserved better

But it STILL wasn’t what you thought

Never was.