From Silence to Sound: The Day I Stopped Being Invisible

Back since I was a teenager until my early college years, I’ve mostly kept quiet even when I had things to say. I’ve unknowingly practiced Quietism.

But what is Quietism? It promotes passivity and resignation. Meaning that individuals should accept their circumstances without attempting to change them.

Remembering those days, I spent a lot of time in classes, surrounded by other students and teachers discussing with each other. Even though I had opinions or had good ideas to share with, I chose to stay quiet. This happened whether I was in a small group or sitting by myself in a big room full of students. Each time, I felt like I missed out on something important. I thought by staying quiet, I would just blend in and not be noticed. But instead, I felt like I wasn’t even there, to others and to myself.

I felt like I didn’t matter.

That feeling didn’t go away whenever the class was over. It stayed with me, affecting how I made friends and how I acted in relationships with others. I always thought I was the least interesting person, and I was scared to say what I needed or wanted.

This feeling made me scared of what others thought, more than believing in my own ideas.

The thought that I wasn’t important kept coming back, reminding me of all the times I had something to say but chose to stay silent.

It was frustrating. Limiting. Isolating. Honestly, the whole thing was really challenging both mentally and emotionally.

As time went on, I started to see these moments not just as choosing to be quiet, but as letting myself down.

Things began to change in my final 2 years of college. I had to lead a group thesis, which meant I couldn’t stay quiet anymore. In a small room, with my groupmates looking at me, I had to share my own thoughts. I expected them not to care or to ignore me which was the norm for me in my early college years. But what actually happened was they listened, they were interested, and respected what I had to say. I still remember that feeling.

The moment I spoke up was when I started to see my worth differently.

What I hoped for myself led not only to personal growth but also to unexpected opportunities and deeper connections.

The decision to finally speak up caused a ripple effect.

It wasn’t just about being heard. It was about engaging with the world around me in a way I never had before.

My relationships deepened because I was more present and authentic.

My sense of self grew as each contribution reinforced my value.

My transformation solidified when I no longer saw myself through the lens of Quietism but as an active participant in my life and the lives of others.

The moral of my story here is that: Your voice has more power than you might believe. It’s a testament of the power of change, of finding one’s voice in a world that often feels too loud.

A lesson I learned from Jean-Paul Sartre as he argued that “existence and reality” can only be defined by “actions”. Meaning people create their own essence through the decisions they make and the actions they do, not what they think or believe they could do under different circumstances

I’m sharing this to encourage you to not underestimate the impact of speaking up and taking action.

Here’s what those difficult years taught me about Taking Action over Quietism:

Lesson 1: Cultivate Self-awareness

Back then, I used to silently agree or understand, yet remain quiet. Despite knowing the answers or having valuable ideas.

The only difference between then and now is my willingness to express myself.

Lesson 2: Challenge Negative Thoughts

For the first few years, all I had was the fear of speaking up and a belief in my own inadequacy.

Since then, I’ve learned to value my contributions. But can I tell you something? Those two initial fears, I still battle with them time from time.

I learned early on that you need to acknowledge them and remind yourself of your value. Ignoring these negative thoughts will only fuel Quietism.

Lesson 3: Set Intentions and Practice Assertiveness

When I was first starting out, I deprived myself of remaining comfortably silent.

No matter how small, you have to set intentions, actively participate and contribute. Small actions can and will compound overtime.

Remembering from back then until now, every time I took action, it always felt good no matter the outcome.

Lesson 4: Transition to A Growth Mindset

I used to be very insecure about my ability to contribute.

I was ashamed that I didn’t have the courage to speak up. And I didn’t challenge myself because of it. It took me a long time to realize those insecurities were holding me back.

View those setbacks as opportunities for growth rather than reasons to fall back to Quietism.

Lesson 5: Seek Support with the Right People

If you are surrounded by people who just don’t care about your thoughts or opinions, you are simply in the wrong group of people.

It’s not the end of the world.

There will always be people who are willing to listen and provide encouragement to you. They may or may not even be within your friends or family.

I appreciate you reading! If my story made you think of your own path or have a similar experience where you found the courage to find your voice? I’d be thrilled to hear about it.

Stay true, Stay Authentic, Stay Existential