From Irresolution to Perseverance

How to use foundational motivation to resolve impasses

The story I tell below is about overcoming prolonged stuckness in my working career. I offer it here to help those who similarly suffer from waffling and hiding out in the face of indecision.

Falling by the Wayside

I sank into the swamp of indecision during my forties and fifties. I had bailed out of academia due to a misalignment of my job duties and personality.

But that was just the beginning. To abandon a college teaching job, I had spent six years preparing for was one shock. But it could not compare with the chaos of trying to start all over and find an exciting alternative.

The job search turned into a process of flaying about in various sales venues. I went from home improvement sales to real estate to entrepreneurship.

None of these worthy options bore fruit, but I learned about the adverse consequences of irresolution.

Resolving the Conflict Between Guilt and Fear

Like with procrastination, GUILT for lack of action becomes established. Conscience delivers its punishment, driving out self-pride, replacing it with ‘tormenting consciousness,’ i.e., I should, I can’t, or won’t; therefore, I am wrong.

I tried to rationalize the guilt away to justify my inaction, only to discover it was beyond my powers. And this is because I could not promote what I wanted to do, start a seminar business, out of FEAR.

I feared failure, rejection, and disapproval, the usual possible outcomes that most of us use, and thereby became irresolute. ‘

The situation was difficult; my wife had a social worker job but only brought in a modest income. I had to act.

I became entangled in a conflict between GUILT and FEAR. I sought to resolve that conflict difunctionally by journalizing and taking recreational drugs. Hiding out like this was not a good move.

Finally, after much delay and irresolution, I came up with an idea for a seminar business in sales. Because I found a partner who was wise about the ways of setting up an online business, I broke through my impasse.

The Arrival of the Redemptive Script

Meanwhile, in the background, another set of ideas was emerging. The journal time produced much insight. I discovered that much of my indecision came from my lack of faith in my beliefs.

And this, in turn, was tied to an underlying sense of unworthiness brought on by early childhood experiences. Those experiences had produced a deficit in self-worth that I wanted to rectify.

This sense of poor self-worth maintained the indecision and irresolution; I saw that I needed a campaign of accomplishments to regain my dignity.

Subsequently, I started a series of self-development projects, weight loss, and smoking cessation, to name the main ones. These achievements have continued with skill building and good works; now, the irresolution is a thing of the past.

As a result, I got stronger. Indecision got transformed into empowerment. What stopped me before became small obstacles to overcome.

| I am happy to report that this story of hesitation turned into a story of redemption and action. Thinking about and considering my options took a back seat to undertakings and achievements.

Consulting other commentators, what do they say about irresolution?

“ Those who, like René Descartes, Thomas Hobbes, John Locke, and Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz, conceived the mind as the creature of human activity, the answer to irresolution is the exercise of the will in making informed judgments and adhering to them.”

Descartes argued for ‘developing the habit of making firm judgments and resolutely carrying them out, no matter how doubtful and uncertain them may be.’ He regarded resolution as an essential component of virtue.

Lastly, another author ( Nathan L. King) places perseverance in opposition to irresolution. He praises the virtue of continuing in one’s activities despite obstacles. And, he argues, persistence is necessary for the attainment of courage.

Conclusion: If you are stuck and don’t know what to do next, look inward. Find underlying sources of your weaknesses, so you can understand what has caused you to become the way you are. Then strengthen the skills you need to fulfill your interests and passion.