FOMO and the Perils of Online Distractions
How to manage FOMO to avoid becoming a hopeless addict
In the hours before dawn, when one tries to formulate a plan for the day, the way forward is sometimes vague and constrained by events on the calendar to which one was previously committed.
The day may provide several opportunities for distraction; this essay teaches you how to cope.
To become energized to pursue a particular goal may be difficult unless there is a thought-out plan. I often have the experience in which a step to implement is momentarily stopped by inner hesitancy.
Blocks of Hesitancy
For example, shall I criticize the boss and risk termination or live with my imagined condemnation by him for the rest of my tenure?
A block appears that argues for a counter move, even a not trying at all, and just leaving things at a fantasy level, unacted on and unresolved.
Taking the road less traveled is sometimes a good thing because engagement cannot compare with the pleasure of thinking about it instead. Unfortunately or not, American culture emphasizes doing and having rather than contemplation and observation.
For me thinking about rather than doing something about which I have reluctance is a more attractive option.
When Regret Gets into the Saddle
Some years ago, I tried to formulate a solution to zero initiative when faced with costly delays in execution. The situation was a sudden arrival of an opportunity to travel to India to teach a sales seminar. I had never been to that country.
Such a journey offered an exciting expansion of worldliness and a wealth of new sensations; however, it was not without financial costs and the inconvenience of missing other events on my calendar.
The longer I waited to decide, the more expensive the adventure, for I would miss staying in the home of a colleague who was soon to leave the country.
In the end, I decided not to go. This decision happened some years ago, and now, in retirement, another chance to make such a journey is unlikely to arrive. And so, I am left with regrets for not choosing to undergo an exciting adventure.
FOMO
Fear of missing out (FOMO) is the fear of missing events or experiences that might make one’s life better.
Fear of regret for not taking advantage of a profitable investment or memorable event may force you to make unwise decisions.
You can become caught then in a quandary: with no decision, you miss out, but making an unwise decision can throw you to the curb.
“FOMO has increased in recent times due to advancements in technology. Social networking sites create many opportunities for FOMO. While it provides opportunities for social engagement,[2] it offers a view into an endless stream of activities in which a person is not involved.”
Growing Trend
With the increase in the mass of content available on the Internet, there is now more chance of depression and anxiety associated with ‘not being in the know.’
“Studies show that FOMO leads to extreme dissatisfaction and has a detrimental effect on our physical and mental health — mood swings, loneliness, feelings of inferiority, reduced self-esteem, extreme social anxiety, and increased levels of negativity and depression. It is not surprising that the use of anti-depressants has risen sharply in recent years due to FOMO.”
I don’t know about you, but as a writer on Medium.com, I am spending a lot more time online than in earlier times. I sometimes miss the interaction of the face-to-face kind.
As we delve into mutual interests and topics, more time is taken up with exchanges with remote beings. I enjoy these encounters, but they are different from flesh-and-blood exchanges.
With Covid, this movement online has increased, as it has for me and others. There is a school of thought that things can get out of order if you spend too much time online.
The Online Example
“In simple terms, being online should enhance our lives, not dominate them. If you need to constantly refresh your apps, check your notifications, or define yourself by your online persona, it’s time to take a break. Why? Because too much time online can make studying, work, and relationships more difficult and even damage your physical and mental health.”
What are the signs of FOMO?
There are several indications that you might be experiencing FOMO.
· You are excessively envious of what others are doing
· You make a foolish decision in order not to miss potential experiences
· You often feel left out of social gatherings
· You are constantly checking social media or other sources of information to see what you are missing
· Comparing your own experiences or possessions to those of others.
Four steps to manage FOMO
Focus on personal growth and self-care.
Cultivate meaningful relationships and activities.
Limit exposure to social media and compare-inducing environments. For example, don’t have social media apps on your cell phone.
Create a decision-making framework based on values and goals and not the attraction of what others are doing.
On the surface, the best way forward is to temper your engagement with the online world by balancing your needs for information and entertainment with your desire for interaction with flesh and blood humans. In a word, choose temperance.
In Sum
Fear of missing out (FOMO) is the fear of missing events or experiences that might make one’s life better. With the increase in the mass of content available on the Internet, there is now more chance of depression and anxiety associated with ‘not being in the know.’ Studies show that FOMO leads to extreme dissatisfaction and is detrimental to physical and mental health. Signs of FOMO include being excessively envious of what others are doing, making foolish decisions not to miss potential experiences, and constantly checking social media or other sources of information to see what you are missing. Manage FOMO by following the suggested steps.
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