TUESDᗩY WITH TOᑎI |TRᗩIN YOUR BRᗩIN |SUCCESS IS IN SIGHT

Focused Forward

The secret to getting everything you want in life comes down to doing the work to define what “that thing” is with specificity

Late last year I announced my intention to become the Black J.K. Rowling. I still believe that. Getting there requires a detailed plan, patience, and the willingness to pivot and persist.

In retrospect, getting what you want is that straightforward. As long as you don’t veer from your course, what you seek will materialize. There is one caveat. You must visualize what you want and articulate it to others. Why? Because it’s nearly impossible to advance to your goal alone.

This life lesson has had long-lasting value. Stars aligned to assign me to the perfect teacher. My instructor’s name is Mom. The credit for keeping me focused belongs to her. She taught me how to hardwire a habit that has circumvented my bent for flightiness.

Low-Key: Chaos is my natural state. Sight stimulates the synapses in my brain. Add a pop of color and I’m off to the races. The art of maintaining focus took time and practice to master.

If you struggle with this pesky problem, we are compadres. The affliction is pronounced in artists and writers. It presents as bouts of procrastination punctuated by rampant perfectionism.

The Solution

Was a matter of being fenced in. Mom diagnosed my deficiency and designed a cure. She grew up on a cattle farm and took her cue from her father. She kept me on task by erecting an electrified barbed wire fence.

Just in case you don’t get my drift, sorry Mom but this is true, it’s an effective strategy to keep a wanderer contained and focused. Maybe my example was a bit extreme, but the point is that the focus can be taught.

The difficulty is in sticking with one goal long enough to think it through. Jacquline Dacres discusses it in a recent post.

Investing time in deconstructing the distance to your goal creates a neural pathway to develop an unconscious habit that is anchored in the recesses of your brain.

Blanket Statement Alert:

From what I’ve observed most people broadly refer to what they want. Three statements that come to mind are, “I want a job I like.” OR “I want to be rich.” OR “I want to be happy.”

Those are all wide-open loosey goosey proclamations. They’re like cotton candy. Sweet yet empty because only sugar and air are supporting them.

What else I’ve learned in life is that most people prefer to utter generalities versus doing the work to answer defining questions. The unvarnished truth is that most people don’t have a specific answer.

What’s mind-boggling is that they tend to get mad at the person who is asking. This leads to a string of excuses about the reason why they are underemployed, broke, and or miserable.

Excuses are the tools of the incompetent used to build bridges to nowhere and monuments of nothingness.

— President Barack Obama

Clarity is key. It unlocks the door of possibility. But, you must decide to exert the effort to find the key. Then you must take action to locate the door. Finally, you put the key in the lock and turn.

Oddly, that’s all you need to understand how to get what you specifically want in life. My mamma taught me that. She’s set and crushed the shit out of some huge goals.

This lady knocked down a stacked deck to become a tenured professor. It took a lot of extra schooling and extra hours of work. It still amazes me to have watched her speak things, that appeared unattainable, into existence.

Following In Her Footsteps

Though I don’t have a slew of letters behind my name. I have racked up ample experience ➖ From the School of Life ➖ crushing goals. This is the value I’ll deliver to the inaugural cohort next month.

The pilot program will test a theory that centers on developing a GPS (Growth Planning Strategy) to achieve one goal. Participants will metaphorically turn the page to the next chapter of life and begin doing the work to rewrite their reality.

BTW: I’ll be walking my talk. My Big Hairy Audacious Goal is to become a traditionally published author, under the Penguin Random House/UK imprint.

The virtual “INKubator/Think Tank” hosted on the campus of the University of St. Francis is scheduled to begin days after welcoming the Chinese Year of the Dragon.

Hypothesis

DARE: To define your goal with a level of specificity. DRAFT: A detailed written plan. DESIGN: A visual strategy to get to your goal DON’T QUIT: Revise and pivot on the plan until you achieve the goal.

Everything YOU want is waiting on the other side of what YOU fear.

Turn The Page… Make Each Day in 2024 Count!

About Me ➖ Toni The Talker ➖ And So It Begins

The talk on Tuesday centers on training your brain to get what you want.