Don’t Make the Same Mistake — Stop Wasting Your Time on Big Publications

Stop flippin' the coin.

It is OK to take chances in life. It is better to have tried and failed than live a life of regret.

When I started writing again, it was both a mental and creative release.

I was first asked to write in a publication, which for me was like the Universe was conspiring and telling me, this is where you needed to be right now. I didn’t need to flip a coin. The answer to my question is, go and write.

Not only that, but as I look back at some major decisions I made in my life, I took chances.

Like when I was thinking should I work as a cruise photographer, which I did. Or when it comes to the men, I loved, and while a few ended up badly, it was all worth the pain.

As I immersed myself in the world of writing. My next goal was to be published in more prominent publications.

Those publications with hundreds and hundreds of thousands of followers. I felt if, and when I get published there, my blogging has taken the next step. To me, it is a validation. Maybe at that time, I felt I needed that to be validated.

It didn’t happen as quickly as I thought it would be. I got accepted to be a ‘writer’ in the biggest publications, and I can send drafts to the editors.

I had a lot of rejections. And while I tell in some of the stories I wrote that never take rejections from editors, it still stings, and it sucks.

It brings back old memories of rejection from childhood that I am not good enough.

It creates doubt, and it did in my head. But I hold on to that thought that I can be good enough in the eyes of these editors. I had to try harder. Months followed, and I wrote, edit, submitted, only to be told to try again next time.

I self-published a rejected story by a prominent publication because I know the story needs to be told. The story was curated, which means it was chosen for further distribution.

I was happy about it, and yet two things stuck on my mind. First, what editors like is subjective, and being chosen for further distribution doesn’t mean the story will go viral.

I was naive as my writing journey is just beginning.

But I was happy. The story was something I never read anywhere before. It is not some “bro advice,” which you get a lot here.

It was about how Facebook alt text will help the visually impaired be more connected during the COVID-19 pandemic. At that time, we all needed a place to feel we belong.

A lot of times, tech companies forget to be inclusive. When I wrote about “voice tweets,” Twitter forgot that there are 466 million people with hearing loss. Without adding transcription, voice tweet is a feature that excludes almost half a billion people.

After that, I finally nailed it. I was published in two of the most prominent publications. Neither really gave me the boost in readership or money.

While I appreciated one editor who really worked with me to improve the story because that part of the creative process is nurturing.

It hurts.

From time to time, I would submit to major publications. It still gives me sleepless nights because the waiting game usually lasts 48 hours before you hear from editors, only to receive a message that they will pass.

Not only does it hurt, but it also delays your earning potential as a writer. I have to admit my writing goals are different now. As much as I love the art of writing, but I also need to start monetizing my craft.

Otherwise, it becomes a costly hobby.

Flip a coin

What are the odds of you being published in a popular publication? It is 50:50, but studies have shown flipping a coin, the odds are actually 51:49. And the odds are against you.

By the way, Google can help you decide if you want to submit your stories to a publication, do a flip coin. Just “Google” — flip a coin, and Voila! a built-in coin-flipping app.

Lessons

1. Don’t look for validation from editors as a writer. Each time you write is a validation that you are already a writer.
2. Whenever editors reject you? Ask yourself what does it do to your psyche? Does it help you or not? Personally, it doesn’t help me at all, and if rejection comes on a bad day, it only amplifies the emptiness I feel when I am having a bad day.
3. A standard rejection message is polite on paper, but it is impersonal. And if it sounds impersonal, you lose the nuances of what could be a learning experience. Remember, a rejection is also an opportunity to learn.
4. Wouldn’t it be more fun to be published in publications that welcome your voice no matter how small you think your voice is?
5. Not being part of the pack could separate you from the rest. When you start writing for publications, you tend to censor yourself to fit with the publication’s brand and tone. Do you really feel like being back in high school? To feel like you belong?
6. The lost time waiting only to be rejected means you have to resubmit it to a much friendlier publication. It hurts your earning potential. Editors don’t care about what you end up with each month, but you do.
7. Don’t treat the friendly publications which helped you from the very start as your second choice. It isn’t right.

Solution

1. Write good pieces. They don’t have to be perfect. But try to be an honest writer. Write from your heart.
2. Use tools like Grammarly, and learn to edit your story.
3. Create your own publications and let them grow. Remember, the only way to increase your publication's readership is by publishing your best pieces in it.

Writers are sensitive. I know I am. And do I seriously need rejection from editors as something I have to deal with? I don’t speak for everyone else. Again., this is my personal journey.

I rather keep on writing for friendly publications, and even if they are small. They make you feel you are wanted. It isn’t an exclusive club. They are more inclusive. They make you feel like they are your family, that you can allow yourself to grow here, you can write here even if you are not at your best yet.

Friendly Publications

Here is the list of my Friendly Publications. Feel free to comment and add a friendly publication that you own or write for. I will add them to this list.

Let us help grow the ones who need us rather than help those who are already big enough.

1. ILLUMINATION by Dr Mehmet Yildiz
2. ILLUMINATION-Curated
3. Feedium by J.J. Pryor
4. Writers’ Blokke