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Abstract

er things, as well — things we would never intentionally put in jeopardy.</p><p id="c31f">And that’s my not-so-subtle way of introducing what is usually the most overlooked yet critical component in most goal-setting presentations — the conscious act of recognizing what’s already working in your life, especially the people, places, and things you should never put at risk.</p><h1 id="48b4">I’m talking about the very real possibility of paying too much to achieve a goal.</h1><p id="ccf8">The symptoms are most obvious in those who are <i>goal-obsessed</i> — consumed with uncommon dedication to their life’s objectives.</p><p id="a0c7">These are the people who compete with sheer drive and overwhelming determination. They always arrive early and work late. They forego vacations in favor of “catching up on the paperwork.” They watch their kids grow up as strangers, and their wives become little more than someone they plan to grow old with.</p><h2 id="19bd">Granted, real accomplishment is seldom achieved without sacrifice.</h2><p id="f58d">And every goal, whether realized or not, <a href="https://readmedium.com/roger-reid-live-an-extraordinary-life-a4df07356a74">comes with a price</a>. Most of us understand that pursuing the things we want often means re-prioritizing other facets of our life — including those having intrinsic or emotional value that’s easy and often convenient to overlook.</p><p id="30f5">We even promise ourselves we’ll make it up in the future, as if we’re putting that part of our life on hold — just temporarily — until we’ve arrived at our desired destination. At least that’s what we tell ourselves.</p><p id="4cbd">The result?</p><h1 id="b659">Without realizing it, we put the most important touchstones of our lives at risk.</h1><p id="fd8a">Those touchstones can be your spouse, your kids, or family members. It can also be your existing degree of financial security, or your health, or your ability to recognize the needs of others who are counting on you.</p><h2 id="3965">Think you’re immune?</h2><p id="4912">Think again. Those destined to become the most accomplished are the most susceptible.</p><p id="39e4">Our natural tendency is to prioritize our time and attention in favor of the new and compelling. But never allow an obsessive preoccupation with any of your goals to result in the most important facets of your life becoming an expendable part of your future.</p><p id="5d4f">The danger comes from being so caught up in the day-to-day striving for success, we never consider the possibility that, with less attention, devotion, or commitment, our most important touchstones <a href="https://taylorstracks.com/reaching-your-goal-wont-make-you-happier/">can easily be lost</a> to neglect and indifference.</p><h1 id="0703">So, how do we avoid letting those vital touchstones slip through the crack?</h1><p id="6831">The key is to identify the <a href="https://readmedium.com/roger-reid-6-timeless-traits-of-family-leadership-b8cc2e102d12">non-negotiable fundamentals</a> in your life, and protect them with a commitment to keep them whole and healthy for the long term.</p><p id="f171"><b>Why go to such lengths to formally identify the parts of our lives we already acknowledge as important?</b> Because it’s part of our nature to discount the stable, nurturing, and comfortable aspects of our lives when those things are an established part of our experience. The fact that they already exist — as opposed to being something we don’t have and are longing for — makes them ideal candidates to take for granted.</p><p id="1f79">It’s seldom our plan to intentionally damage our relationship with our spouse or family. We don’t deliberately set out to destroy long-held friendships or neglect the parts of our lives that give us comfort. But unfortunately, it happens a little at a time — a missed birthday here, a forgotten anniversary there — and over the years, it adds up.</p><h2 id="615a">Unintentional indifference can extract a heavy toll, especially on primary relationships.</h2><p id="6c9e">After decades of neglect, the fire goes out — because it wasn’t tended, fed, or supported. In essence, it was allowed to die. And now, each partner finds themselves living with a stranger of convenience.</p><p id="dacb">If you want to avoid this destructive side-effect of pursuing career and life goals with a single-minded obsession, the process is simple:</p><h1 id="7031">Make a list of all the things in your life that are important to you.</h1><p id="a744">Include the things that are positive, make a difference in your attitude, give you pleasure, and motivate you. Bottom line, you’re identifying the things you enjoy, appreciate, and fill you with gratitude.</p><p id="00ab">If you don’t want to call them touchstones, call them foundational elements, or your base support system. But regardless of what you call them, these are your reasons for getting up in the morning, for going to work, for coming home — because you know those things are waiting for you.</p><p id="4ac2">This list is your personal reminder of <a href="https://readmedium.com/roger-reid-the-secret-to-living-a-happy-life-509f789e5766">what must come first</a>, <i>and what must always be protected</i> as you continue to work toward a more rewarding life.</p><h2 id="7138">They’re also the things you don’t gamble with.</h2><p id="10be">Because without them — even th

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ough you achieve your most ambitious goals — your life won’t have the same meaning.</p><p id="6ef7">Your achievements won’t bring you the same level of satisfaction and pleasure you’d hoped to receive. And you’ll realize — too late — that the people closest to you, the ones you’d assumed would always be there to celebrate with you, to share in your victories, and enjoy your success, are no longer a part of your life.</p><h1 id="c902">Not sure what to put on your list?</h1><p id="9b90">I’ll give you a peek at mine.</p><ul><li><b>The first thing on my list is my wife</b>. She’s smart, takes care of her health, and works with a sense of dedication and persistence that gives her the advantage of being successful at whatever she chooses to do. And most importantly, she puts up with me. I would never consider pursuing any objective that would put my relationship with her at risk.</li><li><b>My second touchstone is maintaining control over my time and personal schedule</b>. I was never a “good” employee. I failed miserably at “normalizing” my personality, behavior, and disposition to fit into a corporate bureaucracy.</li><li><b>My third touchstone is where I live.</b> For the last ten years, my wife and I have lived on the gulf coast of Florida. I’ve become accustomed to 75 degree winters and tolerable summers. I wouldn’t consider moving to a climate with below-freezing winters. Nor would I entertain the idea of moving to somewhere like Phoenix, where the summers reach 118 degrees. So where I live is important, because I’ve learned I’m happier and more productive in milder climates.</li></ul><h2 id="05ed">Your list will no doubt be different.</h2><p id="d188">But the fact that you make one will put you far ahead of those who set goals without first identifying the important, non-negotiable people, places, and things that make them happy.</p><p id="403a">So as our world begins to return to normal and you find yourself reconsidering your priorities and re-evaluating your current and future professional objectives, I encourage you to include the important relationships, the core values, and the personal interests that are paramount in your life. Give them the importance they deserve by imagining what your life would be like without them.</p><h1 id="7b13">I’ll leave you with this</h1><p id="3b2e">Socrates argued that the unexamined life isn’t worth living. I’ll offer the counterpoint that subjecting every part of your life to evaluation, measurement, and control can kill spontaneity, shackle creativity, and <a href="https://readmedium.com/roger-reid-buzz-aldrin-on-the-moon-ec9ddf441d41">blind you </a>to the things of value and importance already present in your life.</p><h2 id="ce11">Certainly, use goals to qualify your time and resources and keep you focused on the highest priority activities.</h2><p id="31be">Just make sure any process used to increase your effectiveness doesn’t prevent you from experiencing — and appreciating — the excitement and satisfaction that can come from simply living in the here-and-now, one day at a time.</p><p id="4c49"><a href="https://www.successpoint360.com/episode-7-transcript/"><i>Listen to the Podcast of this article at Success Point 360</i></a></p><p id="3fcc"><i>© 2021 <a href="https://successpoint360.com/">Roger A. Reid</a>. All Rights Reserved.</i></p><p id="d849"><b>Roger A. Reid</b> is the author of <a href="https://amzn.to/33lLOZo"><b><i>Better Mondays</i></b></a><b><i> </i></b>and <a href="https://amzn.to/3hn6V5G"><b><i>Speak Up</i></b></a>.</p><div id="13c1" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/roger-reid-live-your-best-life-now-1e9337541727"> <div> <div> <h2>Live Your Best Life Now, Because the Future Doesn’t Look So Great</h2> <div><h3>How a friend’s predictions of the future changed my mind about getting older</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*b3S1pZ_3EJjvGi8YwVko0A.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="1ac5" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/roger-reid-the-secret-to-aging-without-apology-or-regret-7a117b509b54"> <div> <div> <h2>Discover the Secret to Aging Without Apology or Regret</h2> <div><h3>10 ways to become the exception to the myth of aging</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*7OpYKiQig5iXHyI4nY0SwQ.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="60c8"><a href="https://successpoint360.com/about"><b>Roger A. Reid, Ph.D.</b></a> is the host of <a href="https://www.successpoint360.com/"><b>Success Point 360 Podcast</b> </a>and author of <a href="https://amzn.to/33lLOZo"><b><i>Better Mondays</i></b></a><b><i> </i></b>and <a href="https://amzn.to/3hn6V5G"><b><i>Speak Up</i></b></a>. A certified NLP trainer with degrees in engineering and business, Roger offers tips and strategies for achieving higher levels of career success and personal fulfillment in the real world.</p></article></body>

Five Reasons I’m Excited About Tulsi Gabbard’s Candidacy

Hawaii Representative Tulsi Gabbard has announced her intent to campaign for President of the United States, and the entire political spectrum is shitting bricks about it. Mainstream liberals and neocons are calling her a Putin puppet and Assad’s BFF, leftists and progressives are criticizing her associations with right-wing factions in India and anti-LGBT comments she made in the early 2000s, conspiracy analysts are criticizing her Council on Foreign Relations membership, and the Zionist elements of Trump’s base are openly promising to destroy her candidacy. A lot of others, myself included, got a lot more interested in the 2020 elections when she threw her hat in.

I’m not interested in defending Gabbard from the criticisms that have been leveled at her at this time; many articles have been written toward that end already, and if she’s going to run for the most powerful elected office on the planet it’s fair to scrutinize and question what kind of person she is. I’m also not interested in endorsing anyone for the presidency. What I am interested in is the way Gabbard’s presence in the Democratic presidential primary race is already in January 2019 upsetting the standard establishment script and forcing foreign policy debates that need to happen.

Here are a five thoughts on that subject:

1 — Gabbard will definitely be the most antiwar candidate on the debate stage by a wide margin, except in the highly unlikely event that someone steps up from way out of left field to run like Dennis Kucinich. Being the most antiwar candidate in anything associated with the Democratic Party is a very low bar, but her vocal positions on Syria, Iran, Yemen, Russia, North Korea, Afghanistan, Gaza, and previous US regime change interventions set her so far from the establishment orthodoxy that she’ll look as different from the other candidates as Ron Paul looked on the Republican debate stage.

2 — Make no mistake, it is this opposition to significant aspects of the US war machine that is the driving force behind the overwhelming bulk of the shrieking objection to Gabbard’s candidacy, not any of the more valid criticisms. We have learned from the mainstream acceptance of Bernie Sanders and Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez that some criticism of the status quo will be tolerated when it comes to domestic policy, but it’s an excommunicable offense when it comes to foreign policy. The idea that the US should forcefully control world affairs using the carrot of alliance and the stick of military violence is so ubiquitous in both of America’s mainstream parties that it takes a Washington Post columnist getting dismembered alive to start a debate about something so self-evidently evil as the Saudi-led destruction of Yemen.

3 — Foreign policy is undeniably the area in which the greater part of US government depravity takes place, and as far as America’s permanent government is concerned it is by far the most important. Forcing a debate on an issue you’re not even supposed to bring up on mainstream media will get a lot of ordinary Americans asking questions that very powerful individuals don’t want asked. The DNC went from scheduling over 20 debates in 2008 to trying to limit it to six in 2016 because they didn’t want Sanders’ excellent domestic policy ideas getting out to the public and making their coronated status quo candidate look bad. Gabbard could have the same impact on foreign policy in an audience that has been aggressively propagandized by MSNBC warmongering.

4 — Gabbard’s progressive positions on issues like Medicare for All, environmentalism, $15 minimum wage, Wall Street accountability, the failed war on drugs, marijuana legalization, criminal justice reform and indigenous water rights will also set her further to the left on domestic policy than anyone on the debate stage besides Sanders should he run. This is a self-evident fact, but a lot of narrative control efforts are being poured into painting her as a right-winger. She will definitely help force the debate to the left, and her position on withdrawing from expensive interventionist war policies answers the “But how are you going to PAY for it??” questions the MSM talking heads are so fond of grilling progressives with on social programs.

5 — For me the most telling thing about Gabbard is the way she resigned from her position as vice chair of the DNC in order to endorse Bernie Sanders in 2016. Other DNC operatives remained inside the Committee and actively schemed to give Clinton every unfair advantage in the primary, but Gabbard showed integrity and refused to advance a biased agenda in violation of the DNC charter. It showed that she’s a real person operating within one of the phoniest places in the world, and that she’s willing to throw a spanner in the works of the machine when it’s in the highest interest. This unwillingness to march to the beat of the establishment drum for such proceedings could lead to some very interesting things as the presidential race heats up.

And that’s good enough for me. She’s not perfect, she’s a major long shot to actually win, but Tulsi Gabbard’s campaign for president will definitely shake things up in all the right places, and good things will come from it. Which is why all the right people are outraged by her bid today.

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