Summary

Nicola's journey with Pilates transformed her perspective on exercise, shifting from a focus on weight loss to an appreciation for strength, longevity, and self-care.

Abstract

The author, Nicola, shares her personal evolution from viewing exercise as a means to lose weight to embracing it as a source of joy and a tool for enhancing longevity. Initially trapped in a cycle of disordered eating and exercise motivated by a desire to be "skinny," Nicola's relationship with food and fitness was fraught with struggle and self-consciousness. Seeking help from a life coach, she learned to enjoy food and exercise for their own sake. This led her to Pilates, specifically reformer Pilates, which she approached with initial difficulty but persistent dedication. Over time, through consistent practice, Nicola discovered the intrinsic rewards of Pilates, such as improved strength, balance, and mental clarity. Her narrative underscores the shift from external validation and appearance-based goals to internal fulfillment and the desire to age gracefully. Now, with nearly 100 Pilates classes completed, Nicola celebrates her resilience and the profound respect she has developed for her body.

Opinions

Exercise was initially seen as a calorie-burning tool for weight loss rather than an enjoyable activity.
The author's body shape and societal pressures contributed to a distorted self-image and disordered eating.
The realization that exercise could be enjoyable came through working with a life coach who specialized in emotional eating.
Pilates, particularly reformer Pilates, became a pivotal point in changing the author's outlook on fitness.
The journey with Pilates was not without challenges, including physical struggles and the initial desire for aesthetic results.
Persistence in Pilates practice led to a focus on strength, balance, and mental well-being rather than weight or appearance.
The author now views Pilates as a long-term investment in health and functionality, aiming to age with vitality.
Achieving the milestone of 100 Pilates classes represents both a personal triumph and a commitment to ongoing self-improvement and care.

Fitness as a Tool for Longevity

How 84 Pilates Classes Changed My Outlook On Exercise

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Maybe it was Weight Watchers.

At some point in life, I remember making the connection that exercise equals calories and calories are to be counted, and I count them to lose pounds.

Losing weight. It has been a constant struggle for me.

The Struggle to Be “Skinny.”

I have never been skinny. Even at my lowest adult weight, I was still curvy. I was in elementary school when I “developed.” I was always self-conscious of my body. I noticed how my thighs were always thicker than the other girls my age.

My body shape brought unwanted attention from older males.

I would feel frightened and betrayed when their friendliness was based on their attraction to me. An attraction that I did not know what to do with. It was unsettling and uncomfortable.

So, I ate. That is when I began my cycle of weight gain and loss by dieting and exercising.

Exercising to Eat

I began the age-old battle of exercising to eat and eating with the plan to “exercise it off.”

My weight would fluctuate up and down due to disordered eating. I would join programs that taught me how to count calories and work out to “enjoy the foods I love.”

Never once did I understand exercise as something I could just enjoy.

After failing once again to lose weight, I decided to get help for my fractured relationship with food. I worked with a life coach specializing in emotional eating, who taught me how to get enjoyment and nourishment from the food I eat. More than that, she taught me that exercise can be something I enjoy.

What a novel idea.

The Joy Of Movement

Exercising because I like it. Not because I want to be a certain size or lose a certain number of pounds. Simply because I wanted to do something for myself.

Sign me up.

The first thing I had to learn was what I enjoyed. This deprogramming was hard. I was so used to thinking about the type of exercise I did because it was “effective” and shown to get “quick results” (anybody ever tried HIIT).

After some thought, I realized I always wanted to take Pilates.

I had tried mat Pilates before, but I never had the chance to use the reformer. That was it. I wanted to take reformer Pilates. I went to a free introductory class, and I was excited about signing up.

I had no idea what the journey would entail, but it was one of my own making.

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From Struggle To Strength

Now, I would love to say I jumped in, and it was smooth sailing, but I had some bumps along the way.

First of all, in the back of my mind (maybe in the front of my mind), I still wanted my body to look a different way as a result of taking classes. I thought about how long and lean Pilates instructors seemed to be, and I felt hopeful I would see the physical results.

What happened was different but powerful.

I struggled. I had a hard time getting into the positions. The breathing was confusing. The reformer was not my friend.

But I stayed with it.

I kept going. Even though I would take breaks sometimes. Full transparency, I even thought about quitting. However, I continued showing up.

I was sore.

I showed up.

I wasn’t losing weight.

I showed up.

I fought through having COVID. I got better, and then I showed up.

Week after week, month after month.

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The Gift of Longevity

Then it clicked. I am doing this for longevity.

It is not about what I look like or a number on the scale. I AM STRONGER. My core is strong. My balance has improved. My mind feels clear when I leave the studio.

Pilates is a gift I am giving to my older self.

I want to continue my practice because I want to be functional and enjoy my life and the process of aging. I will show up for myself because I do not want the alternative. I want to be vibrant and able to travel and take the stairs if needed.

My newfound respect for my body is priceless. Now, I know I can do hard things.

So, I am on my way to completing 100 Pilates classes. It will be a big achievement for me. My name will be added to the wall at my studio, and I will have my picture taken. Just writing about it makes me smile.

The more important part of this is it marks a new beginning for me.

I am on my way to honoring my body for its strength and giving it what it needs to function how it should. I am not where I want to be, but I am committed to doing the things I need to get there. I want to live a life full of vitality, and I have so much more I want to experience and achieve.

Future me will be thankful.

Nicola is a wife, mother, and recovering perfectionist specializing in successful women with a secret struggle: “Having it all.” If you are interested in unpacking your truths, operating intentionally, and experiencing a satisfying life, you can connect with her at www.livingintentionpurpose.com