Fishes and Flounders
Move over, Durrell and Herriot
Meeting Fish-Frog-mad Nikhil
He was my Higher Secondary* classmate. He used to carry frogs in his pockets. Not as a prank. To keep them warm while they grew.
My Frog Prank
I borrowed one of his frogs to scare a friend. He was more concerned for the frog than for the gift’s receiver. Or for my conscience in doing something so mean. He made sure the gift box, his frog’s home for an hour — was airy.**
First Get a Real Job, Boy!
This is crazy behavior in India. We focus on studies and anything else we do is taboo Till we get into a good college and land a good job. Animal rights people support, from a distance. For him, it wasn’t only fish. It was amphibians, birds, and land animals too.
Only Meat Eaters Should Own Pets
He is a Brahmin, an upper caste, sworn to vegetarianism and academics. Yet a Brahmin whose house smelled like a meat eaters’ Unthinkable! Most Brahmins have never even seen or touched garlic*** let alone raw meat. He would sneer at the elders. His dogs weren’t vegetarian, didn’t they know?
How come, Where from?
He used to order fish eggs to breed. How does somebody grow up in India and know where to order fish eggs Before the age of the Internet? His dad and mom worked at a bank and knew nothing about fish Other than that they smelled disgusting.
Breeding Better than Writing or Reading
He must have been like a tiny Gerald Durrell. Though aloud he brushed Durrell and Herriot off, saying that he had no time for reading them because he preferred live things to words about live things.
He actually liked reading, but about How to breed fish, put them in larger and larger tanks. So they could move. Then he’d sell them to people who liked fish, too with tanks larger than his.
Breed and Sell for Loving, Not Eating
Never for eating. He didn’t breed those kinds. It would be wrong. He liked having more fish and frogs and birds and animals around. Not less, because someone ate them up. He is a breeder. Not a supplier to a butcher.
Let’s have a Fish Tank in our Garden!
In his housing society as an adult he has convinced everyone to give up common garden space and to get a pool dug For fish. Now there are more fish mad people, Some children, in his housing society
Protective Grills for Gills
Can you imagine how many parents would have worried their children would fall In the pool or be bitten by the fish? Or crabs or salamanders or God knows what else is in those murky depths. How they would have fought him? So he got a grill over the tank. He’s reasonable that way. Or maybe he is protecting the fish from the people and not the other way round.
More Than Fish, Less than Social
He also has all kinds of land animals in his house. 7 or 8 dogs and cats and tortoises and of course frogs. His wife’s rule of no new animals in the house is constantly broken. He’s never had the time to talk on WhatsApp Or research the Net on how to sleep better Or attend college reunions and discuss failures and comparative successes. Fish! Eggs! Breeding season! Post office, my frozen fish egg parcel will melt and die, gotta go! Need a bigger tank! The dogs or the cats and the chipmunks love him.
A New Kind Of Crawly from South Africa!
New animals come in crates from a different shore, wait at the airport to be adopted by him. From distant South Africa, because he’s Contacted a breeder as mad as himself and effected a barter Such occasions are festivals in his house Sometimes, there is a consignment of an animal which is food for another. These, he regretfully allows to be eaten. He even breeds them for the purpose because it is the Law of Nature.
Nope, Not a Vet
His wife keeps him focused, they both work together in the same workplace, nothing to do with animals Have to earn enough to buy more fish and frog eggs and tanks Some inspired by their kids His son and daughter are animal crazy too, like their dad.
Doing, not Screen-Timing
A family which uses a computer screen Only to find out even more about breeding animals Never stopping to record, boast or upload a picture. Living life, extending life forms and focusing on dying breeds But why did Sanka Rathnabarana remind me of this forgotten classmate?
Better Dead than in a Bowl
This classmate used to say, kill the fish. Don’t let them live. Throw them on the floor, let them die. But don’t keep the fish in a bowl. The poor fish goes into depression and goes round and round in the bowl like a madman.
Not Even Metaphorically
I don’t have fish and I was speaking metaphorically about goldfish in a bowl, meaning being on display. Nikhil didn’t like it. He shuddered. He made me feel like a murderer for mixing my metaphors with his feelings.
Pictures credit his not-so-fish-crazy wife, a dear friend of mine. Thank God somebody took some pictures.
*Higher Secondary is Class 11 and 12, between matriculation and college or university. Also called pre-university.
**We punched large diameter holes in the frog’s cardboard shoebox and pinholes in the gift wrap over them for aesthetic air. For that story, wait up.
***Garlic is said to be non-vegetarian for 2 reasons:
1. Garlic is always growing, as it is a root. So it would be wrong to eat something that isn’t a fruit, or a vegetable, but a growing root. Onions are avoided by strict vegetarians for the same reason.
2. Indian mythology says: garlic and onion have grown from the blood and saliva of demons Rahu and Ketu, who swallowed the potion of immortality before being beheaded. Rahu-Ketu swallows the sun and moon during eclipses.
Inspired by Sanka Rathnabarana ‘s poem
Tagging r.j. quirk Lee Nourse Gail Goldberg Roland Weber Terry Mansfield MicheletheTrainer Ivette Cruz Ann Marie Steele Caroline de Braganza and @Tej to write a poem based on Fruit, as in the Share The Love issue 11 Martin Rushton as per the submission guidelines below.