Finding Courage, Especially When You’re Spitting Against The Wind
It’s not about being unafraid, but more about not allowing fear to stunt your living.
‘Courage is not a man with a gun in his hand. It’s knowing you’re licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and you see it through, no matter what. You rarely win, but sometimes you do.’
To Kill A Mocking Bird…it was just a movie, but a memorable, courageous movie that we tend to watch again and again, because of the element of integrity, of doing what is right, regardless of public opinion. Integrity is the glue that superbly binds the story.
Who better to demonstrate integrity than Atticus himself? Despite his inner belief that he could not win a rape case that a young black man had been accused of, he determinedly represented him as he would a white man, in the same situation.
Did he expect that he’d win? We all know the answer to that. Black people in those days had little hope of having the rules of law see them acquitted. Atticus Finch was well aware of that, and yet, whilst ever there was a glimmer of hope, any shard of possibly winning, he vested every ounce of energy he could bring to the situation, and against all odds, won!
“Courage is the commitment to begin without any guarantee of success”.
And that is the courage we must all find within us if we are to survive the testing times in our lives, for at some stage we will all have to dig deep to try to find the bravery to win through.
The truth is that most of us feel we are anything but courageous. That may be because we have never been truly tested, but the reality is, that for most of us, the strength is there hidden deeply in our psyche, ready to help when and if we need to draw on it, and summon it into action.
Times when courage magically appears…
Environmental disasters are prime examples of people banding together in the face of horrific events. The unimaginable horrors of the Christmas bush fire in NSW, a prime example. As the whole world looked on in disbelief, we Australians spent our time glued to televisions, totally stymied by the immensity of the walls of flames, untrained for such chaos, feeling both immense fear, and helplessness.
And yet, amazing things happened. The fire-fighters who were reduced to specks of themselves as they tirelessly fought the cataclysmic flame, turned up day, after day, fearful, and exhausted, but determined.
We watched the chaos on television, moved to tears, but safe, and we marveled at the tenacity of the fire fighters and volunteers, in the face of such adversity. Where on earth did, they find their courage, especially in the dead of night, when hope seemed so very far away, and yet, having to try again, and summon, from somewhere, unmatched bravery to soldier on.
Courage against the odds…
Recently I learned of the death of one of the most courageous of young women. Claire Wineland had cystic fibrosis, a progressive and terminal genetic disease that causes a build-up of mucus in the lungs and other organs.
It’s a horrendous condition that impacts greatly, physically, emotionally and financially on families generally, and on the patients in particular.
Having taught two children with this condition, I was struck by how each of them displayed maturity, courage and a wisdom beyond their years. Given the brevity of their lives, with death ever hovering, somehow, they dealt with it.
Each of these girls lived life to the fullest. They laughed with their friends, they cried, and like Claire, they determined to give every day they had, their very best shot.
One of them, Kathy, died in her 21st year, right in the midst of her university degree and with plans for marriage. Up until a few days before her death she was planning an overseas trip with her partner.
But death came knocking nonetheless.
Sophie was around fourteen when she passed away. Like Kathy she had been accepted into university, although she had struggled to attend school the week before. That is courage.
‘Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day that says I will try again tomorrow”.
Claire Wineland passed away after a successful double lung transplant that she had resisted having for a number of years. Life was as it was, she felt, and double lung transplants were not part of what she had in mind, and it wasn’t until the reality of her suddenly-failing health hit her, that she agreed to undergo surgery.
Sadly, she suffered a massive stroke on the right side of her brain after surgery, and passed away shortly after.
What is amazing about Claire is that for most of her ‘adult’ years she worked tirelessly and cheerfully as an advocate for people with CF and chronic illness.
Claire’s attitude to living is born out when you realize that at the age of only thirteen, she founded the http://clairesplacefoundation.org to help children and families affected by CF, a foundation that continues even after her death.
And though Claire’s life was always going to be short, she refused to let that define her. Instead, her bravery and her sense of the ridiculous were her shining lights, and as she so rightly said, “We all need to be NOT afraid of what hasn’t happened yet.”
Atticus Finch would have been cheering Claire on, because his idea of courage so matched that of Claire! Courage is most certainly, “knowing you’re licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and you see it through, no matter what. You rarely win, but sometimes you do.’
Claire may have died, but in her short life, she achieved so much more than most of us. Hers was the exemplar of how to make every day count, how to take that extra step, and be courageous despite the odds.
Below I have penned ten of her inspirational quotes, words of wisdom that may inspire you in times when you need to dig deeply to find courage.
1. “I hope you know that people who suffer most in life, actually have the most to give.”
2. “Don’t let death make decisions for you.”
3. “You know what the best thing about the hospital is? The connections you make. You kind of make amazing memories there that you never would make in your regular day to day life.”
4. “Our bodies aren’t here to be beautiful…they’re here to be a piece of art, to keep us going, to show everything that we’ve done, everything that we’ve been through.”
5. “I have lived an incredible life because I am sick, and because I have suffered. Every good thing that has come out of my life has come from the pain that I felt.”
6. “You can be in pain and yet you can see beauty, and that’s what makes life so incredible.
7. “We are both the creators and observers of our universe.”
- “Life does not go on hold just because you’re suffering.”
- “Death is inevitable. Living a life, we can be proud of is something we can control.”
- “Why wait to be healthy? Why not live life to the fullest?”
So, when you are in doubt, when you’ve reached a crossroads in your life, and when you are struggling against the odds, perhaps you could take comfort from the fierce determination of Claire, and perhaps draw strength from the quotes she left for all of us.
Allow yourself to feel and embrace courage. Think courageously. Be in charge. Sit in the driver’s seat of your dilemma. That’s where you will have the best view of things. It’s where you will start to appreciate the power within you, and cope with whatever is causing you angst.
“The thing about being brave is it doesn’t come with the absence of fear and hurt. Bravery is the ability to look fear (and hurt) in the face and say, move aside. You are in the way.”
Wishing you every success.