Finding Beauty in Slow and Simple Living: Lessons from an Unlikely Friendship
Discovering Authenticity and Meaning through the Stories of a Homeless Friend
On my lunch break, I headed to the Bayfront to check on my homeless friend, Tony. I sat beside him soaking up his incredibly terrifying stories as usual and wishing I could fix everything for him. Oh, how I would love to give him a roof over his head or even just a comfy bed to lay his weary body down.
Tony doesn’t want me to fix anything for him. In fact, he doesn’t want anything from me at all. So instead, I listen. Eventually, I ask questions, and when Tony speaks, I look him in the eyes. His eyes are sky blue, the kind of blue that surprises you when your gaze meets his. His face is weathered and aged, but I’m fairly certain he’s only a decade my senior at best.
Tony’s stories are larger than life and even though I try not to be, sometimes his stories make me nervous. I admit it. I don’t know what to do with his stories. Like the one where he was ordered to set fire to an entire village. Like the colors he was wearing the first time he danced with the devil. Or the time he took someone’s life. Nervous.
Tony tells me he loves his life, but he would love a hot bath. He loves people watching which is one of my favorite things of all time. Sometimes we don’t talk about anything much at all. We just make up incredulous stories about the people that pass us by and then we laugh hysterically at the elaborate detail and the amazing lives these strangers have. I love to see him smile. It actually takes my breath away for a split second every time. A smile is so simple, but on Tony, it’s pure magic.
My mornings are usually rushed and hectic, but when I sit down next to him on the bayfront seawall, Tony’s voice is slow and simple. Tony himself is anything but simple and is far more educated than I’ll ever be. His voice though is intentionally slow and simple. He likes to slow down, watch and listen. He tells me if I just watch, I will see things as they really are. If I listen, the truth is all around me.
As I stood up to leave today, Tony was getting settled in to take a nap since he’s been sick for weeks now. I worried when I said goodbye today. Worried I might not have heard all the stories yet and worried our time together would be cut short. Worried Tony doesn’t yet know how loved he truly is.
Instead of asking anything of me, Tony said, “I want you to listen to me, Kristen.” Yes, my real name but Tony probably isn’t his. “I want you to remember one thing.” I took a step closer to make sure I didn’t miss a word. “Remember that slow and simple living is the best living.” And there was that magic smile.
Remember that slow and simple living is the best living. -Tony
“Yes, Tony. I think you’ve got it right.”
Few know I sold everything I owned a couple of years ago in pursuit of the exact life Tony reminded me of today. Slow and simple living is the best living and for me, it’s the beginning of authenticity and beauty. Slow and simple living is removing all the junk in my life to see and hear the beauty I miss otherwise. The beauty of nature, the beauty of relationships, the beauty all around me.
I hope you’re resting well tonight, Tony. I hope you feel safe and loved. I hope you’re warm. I hope you see and hear exactly what you need to see and hear.
Slow and simple. The beginning of beautiful living. I hope you encounter someone today whose smile takes your breath away.