Summary

The article discusses the inevitability of heroes letting us down and the importance of recognizing their humanity, learning from their mistakes, and finding new role models.

Abstract

The text delves into the complex nature of heroism, emphasizing that even our most revered heroes are fallible human beings. It acknowledges the disappointment that comes when heroes fail to meet our expectations but encourages readers to move past the heartbreak and learn from these experiences. The article suggests that heroes are not inherently different from us and that their shortcomings can teach us valuable lessons about personal growth and the dangers of idolizing individuals. It also reminds us that we, too, can be heroes to others and must strive to live up to the expectations placed upon us, while understanding that perfection is not a human trait.

Opinions

Heroes are often idealized, but they are as prone to mistakes and poor judgment as anyone else.
The realization that a hero is just a person can be a source of heartbreak, but it is a natural part of life and relationships.
Heroes can teach us what not to do when they fail, thereby providing a different kind of lesson in character and integrity.
It is important not to place heroes on an unattainable pedestal, as this can lead to disillusionment when they reveal their human flaws.
We should be mindful of our own status as potential heroes to others, recognizing our own limitations and the responsibility that comes with being looked up to.
The article suggests that the strength of our faith in others should not overshadow the strength of our own principles and actions.
It is crucial to believe in people and their capacity for good, without elevating them to the status of idols.
The text encourages self-acceptance and the understanding that each person is capable and "enough" to do meaningful work in the world.

Find New Heroes When Your Current Ones Let You Down

Reframe your thinking

For every hero in life, there’s a counterpart, a villain. Our heroes have both counterparts — the good and the evil — not evil, per se, but even heroes have a terrible day. A day when your heroes let down their guard and show that they aren’t always heroes, but underneath a tough exterior, they are people too.

There are the heroes we see in stories, in movies, and the unsung heroes who don’t put on a cape to do good work. Most heroes are humans living their lives and don’t have any real superpower. That’s a harsh realization when they let you down. It’s to be expected. It will happen. You’ve realized that your hero is just a person that you’ve awarded superpowers to. They didn’t ask for the honor, but you gave them the strength and potential to be something special. They let you down when they didn’t live up to your expectations.

The realization is a tough one because you still mourn what was. As with any relationship, the heartbreak has to mend.

Did your hero screw up?

Yes. But what happens now?

Heroes are people we believe in. They are models who encourage and inspire us to rise to a higher level of being our personal best. They build us up and help us grow. And, they are human. They don’t have any real power, even if somehow you’ve found yourself in a place to revere and respect them.

Heroes are still people, which means they will screw up on occasion. Good people aren’t always right. Just because you admire their good qualities doesn’t mean they are admirable in every way. It’s hard to imagine that a hero can fail to show up, but it happens. It’s life.

What do you do when your heroes let you down?

You have to get over your heartbreak. It’s like any other relationship. Sometimes things don’t work out, and you decide to go separate ways. Somehow you have to make amends and move past the hurt. Your hero didn’t mean to hurt you. Maybe she did, but you’ve still got to focus on moving beyond the pain. Perhaps your hero isn’t a hero, after all. It’s possible she has grown too big of a self-serving ego and has questionable tactics. More than likely, your hero is more human than you care to admit.

Don’t Meet Your Heroes

Looking up to heroes puts them on a level above you. Your heroes inspire you until the moment they let you down. More than one hero I’ve gotten close to has let me down. I got close enough to see something I never expected. My heroes showed me they were human. They had a bad day and took it out on someone else in a way that was unbecoming of the status they had acquired. When you get too close to your heroes, you realize they are people too.

“We can be in our day what the heroes of faith were in their day — but remember at the time they didn’t know they were heroes.” — A.W. Tozer

Learn from their Mistakes

Heroes help us grow on a personal level and they are constantly evolving into new beings themselves. Some get an ego. Some get self-righteous. Some don’t deserve the honor we give them. In moments when they let us down, they’re still teaching us something. They’re teaching us what ideals we don’t want to prescribe to. When heroes fail, they show us they aren’t as brilliant as we thought they were.

So what if Lance Armstrong is a cheat, Joe DiMaggio wasn’t nice, or OJ fumbled the football. The men we thought were made of steel weren’t anything like the Superman of our dreams. They are fallen idols who shattered our dreams.

And, they still taught us things:

Try harder
Be better
Go the extra mile
Help others
Do good work

As much as we look up to heroes, we forget that someone is looking up to us in the same way.

“It is not the strength of your faith that saves you, but the strength of Him upon whom you rely.” — Charles Spurgeon

Believe in People

When heroes become idols, we’ve put too much faith in them. I remember meeting someone I looked up to for the first time. My hands got sweaty and my pulse quickened as though it was a first date. It’s easy to see their success and which other high-profile people clammer to be around them. You want some of that glory for yourself. Make sure the people you look up to are of sound principle. When you learn that your hero isn’t what you thought you’ve believed she loses your respect. It’s time to reframe your thinking or find new heroes.

“Beware of manufacturing a God of your own: a God who is all mercy, but not just; a God who is all love, but not holy; a God who as a heaven for every body, but a hell for none.” — J.C. Ryle

Don’t Be a Hero

Not don’t be a hero, exactly, but, rather this: If someone looks up to you, will they see chinks in your superhero armor someday? Likely, they will. Because you and I are not heroes. We are people, living our lives trying to do good things for people when and where we can. Sometimes we let people down.

You may not meet those who call you hero. Your man or woman of steel may continue to have power your whole life. When you meet people you adore, you may walk away from the encounter wishing you hadn’t met them in the first place.

“I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And that which I can do, by the grace of God, I will do.” — D.L. Moody

Love yourself for who you are. Believe you are enough and gifted to do the work you are called to do. Be a hero someone else wants to look up to.