Finally, I’m Okay With Not Telling My Sides Of The Story

Summary

The author has come to terms with the futility of constantly defending their actions to others, realizing that people's perceptions are often unchangeable and that personal peace is more important than external validation.

Abstract

The author reflects on their past tendency to insist on telling their side of the story to gain understanding and approval from others. With maturity, they've grown weary of the constant need to prove their worth and have accepted that people will believe what they choose, regardless of evidence to the contrary. The author now finds comfort in not engaging in justifications, recognizing that self-knowledge is more important than the opinions of others. They acknowledge the pain of being misunderstood without a chance to clarify, yet they've learned that silence can be a powerful response, preserving relationships and reputations. The author emphasizes the importance of focusing on what truly matters and not wasting time on transient judgments from others.

Opinions

People often form beliefs based on their own biases, making it difficult to change their minds through explanations or justifications.
Constantly striving to make others understand or like you can be exhausting and ultimately unrewarding.
Self-worth should come from within, not from external validation or the approval of others.
Sometimes, maintaining silence is the best course of action, even if it means others will continue to hold incomplete or incorrect views about you.
The author believes in the principle of reciprocity, suggesting that kindness and understanding will eventually be returned in some form.
It is important to conserve energy for matters of true significance rather than expending it on defending oneself against unfounded judgments.
The loudest voice in a conflict is not necessarily the one that is correct, and it is often better to refrain from engaging with those who do not value your perspective.

People believe what they want to believe

When I was a teenager, I always want to tell my side of the story so people will understand why I did some things. I can’t accept the feeling that people are going to misunderstand me if they don’t hear from my side. I will go to the extent just to prove that I have my reason for everything. So that people will pick my sides and not hating me. I don’t understand the obsession of wanting people to like me back then.

As I’m getting older, I feel like I’m tired of constantly proving my worth to people. People believe what they want to believe, no matter how many times we try to convince them that their belief is wrong. No matter how much I do to prove that I’m a good person, it doesn’t change their perception of me. You know why? Because when people already set their mind to hate you, no matter how many good things you have done, it doesn’t matter.

I’m so tired of explaining myself that I don’t tell my sides of the story anymore. I feel okay with it. I don’t care if people want to listen or believe anymore. I know myself more than anyone else, so why would I shatter because of people’s perceptions and opinions of me? I don’t want to be that person anymore. It’s exhausting. It’s wasting my time.

Some situations still left a scar in my heart because I never had time to tell that story from my point of view. I had those moments that I thought, “You don’t even know what you’re talking about. You only listen to one side and you assume it’s the entire story”. There are so many people hating me because of that. Honestly, I was so sad. They don’t even know the actual story, but still act as they knew. They don’t know how I kept some stories to myself just to save their reputation and relationship; marriage. Seriously, if they knew the complete story, they will be ashamed of themselves.

If keeping it to myself can help so many people, why won’t I? Sometimes, silence is the best answer. I believe that what we give; we get back. Maybe, one-day people will help me too (in another way). We cannot control how people feel about us. Sometimes, I feel it’s better to just let it be. Let people think what they want to think. Let us focus on something that matters for us. Don’t waste our valuable time on things that will not matter 5 years from now.

“Never assume that loud is strong and quiet is weak,”

It’s hard at first to just let people assume things about you but it’s better that way rather than keep on explaining your sides so many times yet people still don’t want to accept it. Some people are really quick to conclude that the loudest one in an argument is right. It’s not right at all. Don’t bother telling people what they don’t want to hear. It is just not worth it.

“Silence is the best answer to someone who doesn’t value your words,”

Finally, I’m Okay With Not Telling My Side Of The Story

People believe what they want to believe