Fear of Success Versus Fear of Failure

You don’t have to be perfect to be successful.

It is not a secret that success and failure are two sides of the same coin. They both leave an impact on your life.

The fear of success can lead us into becoming perfectionists who never allow themselves any time for rest or relaxation because they have this idea in their head that they have to do their best all the time. The fear of failure can lead us into becoming quitters who give up before we even try because we feel like we will fail anyways so why bother trying?

Life is complicated, isn’t it?

I’m here (literally, here — writing on Medium) because I was floundering is a sea of uncertainly and self-doubt. I feel like I am finding my voice, I guess that’s what happens when one produces 230 plus articles in 16 months. In doing so, I can sift through the reality that I never defined success and lived in a constant state of feeling like I was failing in life.

Yeah, it’s a f*cked up path and not one I recommend anyone taking.

Imposter syndrome took the driver’s seat.

Now, I’ve pushed that beast aside because regardless of success or failure, I have the confidence of self-believe-in and charting my own course.

I am not going to pretend that I have it figured out, because I absolutely do not. I am trying to live for now more often and let go of the stress that consumes me. Of course, this is much easier send than done — but I acknowledge where and how my path is veering off the road. This learning in its captures one definition of success.

It’s all an iterative process...

The fear of success is often seen as a way to protect oneself from these potential negative outcomes that may occur should you fall short of your desired goals.

Whereas, the fear of failure is often seen as a means of ensuring that individuals do not take risks and avoiding putting too much pressure on themselves.

But, there is a common denominator here: there will always be an element of risk in any endeavour, so the best way to deal with it is by making sure you are that you are at least aware of this reality.

Whether you are a self-proclaimed risk taker or not, the risk still exists: embrace it. If you are a conserve risk-taker like me, you may even prefer to reframe risk altogether as “opportunity” to make the most of this journey.

What matters most? In the end, what is success anyway? How are you choosing to define it?

True success is not a monetary gain or the acquiring of power; it’s finding what brings you joy and happiness. However, so often humans exchange money for success and as time passes, every person I have met shares this is absolutely the furthest thing from the truth.

If you are balancing between fear of success and failure — I offer you this:

What does success feel like?

Ignore what it looks like because in doing so, you are distracting yourself.

Lean into what bring you joy and happiness because leading a life filled with experiences that yield this sort of outcome — this is success.

Embracing opportunities that fill your life with these emotions help navigate away from a superficial definitions of both success and failure because the experience of living is what life is all about.

Liberty Forrest, Author invites:

“Keep putting one foot in front of the other…and one step at a time, you will begin to walk down a new and much happier path that leads to success.”

And, as you do, take a moment to look around and observe your surroundings and identity element of joy, no matter how seeming small or “insignificant”. Ask yourself, “what do I need to do to experience more of that?”

Success for me is simple: it’s as simple as a smile and laugh — and making an effort to do something each day that makes someone’s day a little brighter.

My recent revelation: it’s okay if that someone is me.

Get inspiration to find joy every day with Trista Signe Ainsworth:

“Our journey was fruitful because we did not give up.” — Trista Signe Ainsworth

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