Exploring The World of Spiritual Bypassing
It crops up in 6 major ways.
I wasn’t aware of it at the time, but I loved sitting in the judgment of others. As an Aussie writer with a Bachelor’s degree in Psychology, I noticed a lot of things about myself that differed me from the rest of the crowd.
For example, in yoga class, I could do handstand longer than others.
When learning Sanskrit, I knew the Sanskrit names of various yoga poses while others didn’t.
Plus, I had traveled to India while other people on the spiritual path had not.
Finally, my pronunciations when chanting were much better than others.
Yet, the issue wasn’t them nor any of them. It was someone else that I haven’t even considered — myself. I realized that I was a “spiritual bypasser”.
Defining Spiritual Bypassing
Spiritual bypassing, a term used by psychologist John Welwood, is a set of beliefs and practices that help us avoid unresolved pain, wounds, needs, and feelings.
We often use spiritual ideologies and concepts to avoid psychological problems. For example, we may blame another person for why we didn’t get that promotion at work.
How We Use Spiritual Bypassing in Our Daily Lives
If you are a typical “spiritual passer”, you will jump straight to some of the higher spiritual practices, like starting with a headstand, studying the Upanishads, and practicing meditation.
If we apply this to regular life, think of your highest learning achievement. Perhaps you are in university. To be able to attend university, you have to first study at high school.
Religious Examples of Spiritual Bypassing
The main text in yoga is the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, consisting of 8 sequential steps.
What we know as yoga — is the third step and not a starting point. It represents physical postures. By doing yoga, you have skipped Step 1 (Yamas) and Step 2 (Niyamas).
Similarly, within Buddhism, by jumping straight into meditation, you start bypassing the 5 precepts.
6 Ways Spiritual Bypassing Manifests in Our Lives
There are many corners and areas of our lives where spiritual bypassing is a reality. These may include our reactions, our judgements, habitual negative patterns, unbalanced views of events, disconnected feelings, denial, and imposter syndrome.
1. Reacting to Others
Sometimes we get angry over seemingly small incidents. These include flying into a rage when someone cuts you off while driving down the speedway, or offending someone for having a specific opinion.
2. Judging Others
Some of us have judgmental thoughts regarding others. For example, perhaps you view another person as if they were “lower” on the spiritual journey than yourself.
3. Producing Habitual Negative Patterns
Many of us continue to intentionally and/or unintentionally attract negative and destructive people in our lives, such as abusive partners or rude acquaintances.
4. Having Unbalanced Views
Some people are just overly negative or positive at certain times. Keeping these thoughts balanced through reflection, introspection, and mapping may be helpful.
5. Disconnection and Denial
There are times where our feelings are so suppressed, that we may feel incredibly “detached” from reality. It’s often an avoidance strategy to escape anxiety.
7. Imposter Syndrome
We don’t always believe we are as competent as others say, even if this were far from reality. Surprisingly, imposter syndrome is prevalent even amongst top-tier professionals.
Preparation is Key
It’s important to do the preparatory work before taking on your spiritual path. Doing prepwork enables progress to the next step, and skipping it will make your next task not possible.
For example, you want to go to Texas, but you live in New York. You think of yourself as someone from California. Following the direction from California to Texas will not get you to Texas.
You will only progress to Texas if you follow the directions from New York.
Next Steps
Now that we have established that you may be a spiritual bypasser, consider the following:
1. Resolving Childhood Trauma
The trauma that you experienced in your infant years (0–5 years old) goes a long way to shaping the rest of your life. Finding a therapist that can assist in processing this trauma is particularly helpful.
I personally recommend primal therapy, somatic therapy, and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR). (You can read more about them at the bottom of this piece.)
2. Being Honest With Others
It’s not going to be easy, but you will need to admit to yourself that you do have a problem. This will alleviate a lot of burden from you.
As mentioned in John 8:32:
“…and the truth shall set you free.”
3. Engaging in Mindfulness
Mindfulness is the act of remaining in the present moment. Through practice, you will become aware of your personal — but ineffective patterns and behaviors.
Thus, you will be able to progress spiritually.
Parting Thoughts
By resolving your spiritual bypassing, you could lead a much fuller and authentic life, such as relating to others, progressing further in your life, and starting a new venture.
By relating to others, letting go of spiritual bypassing allows one to be more honest and vulnerable. By being more vulnerable, people will be able to relate to you on a more personal level.
What you previously saw as a weakness is now a strength — and it will attract others while ceasing judgements. As you progress, you will want to move from a place that makes the next step worthwhile.
If you do start or follow an existing or new pathway, start with something, like character development. If you choose to follow the path of Yoga, Hinduism, and/or Buddhism, learn to internalize higher values for your character development.
Be courageous and take the first steps to transform your life. The problems associated with spiritual bypassing aren’t permanent and can be resolved — with a great smile on your face.
As Thich Nhat Hanh once famously said,
“For things to reveal themselves to us, we need to be ready to abandon our views of them.”
For more information on the therapies discussed in this piece, please see the following video links:
To see Swami Dayananda’s talk on spiritual bypassing, please see:
For similar content from the author, please visit: