Everything You Need To Know To Begin Your Parts Work Practice

Answers to the most common questions beginners ask about parts work.

Whether you’re learning about parts work for the first time or are just getting started with your parts work practice, this article has the answers to your questions.

Answers to the most common questions people ask when hearing about parts work for the first time.

If you’re just learning about parts work for the first time, here are some answers to the most common questions about parts work.

What is parts work?

Parts work is an emotional healing modality based on the understanding that everyone’s inner world is actually an ecosystem of many different parts.

The core belief of parts work is that there are no bad parts. That every single part of you is only ever trying to protect you in the best way they know how — even the ones who don’t have the most helpful behavior or outcomes.

Instead of pathologizing or demonizing the parts of you trying to protect you through more extreme and unhelpful behavior, parts work allows you help those parts of you feel safe enough to let down their metaphorical weapons and armor so you can find the root cause of their pain and help them release it at the root.

Once their pain is released, their behavior won’t have to be so extreme. You might be surprised how often those “trouble-maker” parts take a 180-degree turn and become some of your most helpful parts.

What is the purpose of parts work?

The purpose of parts work is to create the quality of connection with yourself that allows you to safely access and release the root cause of your trauma.

Parts work is also beneficial for taking steps forward with your life (not just healing the past). Among many other things, parts work allows you to better understand your emotional patterns so you can make a strategic plan about how to make progress toward the life of your dreams in a way that honors all parts of you.

Why should I care about parts work?

In my opinion, parts work is the single most effective tool to both heal the wounds of your past and achieve your goals for the future. (Oh, and it makes the present moment quite a bit better, too, because you’re never alone — you’ve always got your parts!)

Parts work will help your emotions make sense, your relationships make sense, and your entire life make sense. And with that clarity, you will have the power to make more conscious and aligned decisions with how you want to live your one precious life.

What are the benefits of thinking about myself in terms of parts?

Many people initially think parts work would lead to further fragmentation and confusion when really it leads to the opposite: a greater sense of wholeness and clarity.

There are two main reasons for this:

1. When you can view your parts as individual beings, you can be in a relationship with them. This allows you to create the quality of connection with yourself that will allow for the most impactful healing and forward movement. A sense of wholeness comes when all of your parts learn to work together as a team.
2. Parts work allows us to have a productive conversation with our parts, which helps us better understand what is actually going on inside of us instead of staying stuck trying to “figure it out” analytically. There is some data you can only collect about yourself in relationships and conversations. Parts work allows you to access that clarity from the inside.

What’s the difference between parts work and multiple personality disorder?

Even though everyone’s inner world is composed of an ecosystem of many different parts, there are some folks who have experienced so much trauma that separated their parts so far away from one another that they present in the outer world as entirely separate personalities. These folks are usually the ones therapists diagnose with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID).

Are parts work the same as the Internal Family Systems modality?

Parts work is the generalized term for any modality that works with the inner world in terms of parts. Within the umbrella of parts work, there are many different modalities — Internal Family Systems (IFS) is one of them.

Structural Dissociation, Transactional Analysis, and Gestalt Therapy are also other ways to work with our parts (among countless others).

In my opinion, IFS is the parts work modality that does the best job of explaining the mechanics of how to work with your parts and the inner world most effectively. It is also the modality that is finally bringing the concept of “parts” into more mainstream psychology and conversation.

Are parts work a trauma-informed modality?

Parts work is THE trauma-informed modality, in my opinion. This is because a core component of parts work is the belief that you have no bad parts. Any behaviors that don’t lead to productive or connecting outcomes aren’t seen as something wrong with you, but rather as a part of you acting on a trauma response in an effort to keep you safe.

Many of our parts are stuck living in our trauma and don’t realize how much time has passed since the traumatic event(s). Parts work helps us retrieve those parts from the past, bring them into the present moment, and work to create a future that is safer than our past — all in a safe way that honors the trauma your parts have endured and are carrying.

Can parts work help me in my relationships?

Oh my goodness, yes! For me personally, parts work is what has finally helped my relationship make sense and provided me with the communication skills I need to deepen the connection of my relationships.

Attachment patterns and trauma can be confusing — parts work is what helps those patterns make sense. And it gives you the skills to communicate what is happening inside of you with your partner in a way that helps it make sense to them as well. It also helps you better understand what is happening inside of your partner because they have parts, too!

Can parts work help me move forward in my life?

Parts work will help you move forward in your life by helping you resolve any past trauma that is still blocking you, get clearer about what it is you want in your life, and build the quality of connection you need with yourself to take courageous steps forward.

Parts work is what allows you to live the life of your dreams from the inside out. Once you build a solid relationship with yourself and your parts, you will be amazed by what you are able to accomplish.

Where can I go to learn more about parts work?

The number one book I recommend is No Bad Parts (or Greater Than The Sum Of Our Parts if you’re into audiobooks) both by Dick Schwartz, Ph.D. (affiliated links).

I also created an online course called Parts Work Academy that is (obviously) about guiding you through the process of parts work every step of the way so you can create the life of your dreams from the inside out and heal your shame for good.

You can learn more about Parts Work Academy here.

Answers to common questions about getting started with parts work.

If you’re already on the path to getting to know your parts, here are some answers to the most common questions people ask at this stage of the process.

Okay, I’m ready to try this out. How should I start getting to know my parts?

Wonderful! I created a free Meet A Part Worksheet for this very reason.

You can download it here.

What does “going inside” mean?

“Going inside” refers to focusing your attention on your inner world. It can often feel like a u-turn; turning your attention from the outer world around 180 degrees to now focus inward on what is happening in your body and inner world.

Does it work best to journal or to meditate when getting to know my parts?

I bet you’ll be able to guess the answer — whatever works best for you!

If you are a natural mediator and are comfortable finding clarity in your inner world that way, totally try getting to know your parts that way.

Some folks can communicate best with their parts through journaling. I recommend starting with what’s called hashmark journaling, where you write a dash and then ask your part a question. And then you write another dash on another line followed by the part’s response. This can provide some structure but also keeps it loose enough to go with the flow.

(If you’re looking for good questions to ask your parts, definitely check out my free Meet A Part Worksheet).

Sometimes I go inside to meet a part and then suddenly go blank. What do I do?

Don’t worry! This is really common and perfectly normal — even for those of us who have been doing parts work for a long time.

The first thing to do is settle into the emptiness. It’s okay if nothing is showing up. It’s okay nothing ends up showing up at all. Start by using this “going blank” time as a time to relax a little deeper into your inner world.

Very often the “blank” sensation comes from the parts of us that are trying to figure something out or trying to get it right. There is nothing to figure out and there is nothing to get right when it comes to parts work. All you can do is be present with yourself and see if any part of you wants to come out for a visit.

Once you relax a bit more, the “going blank” feeling will go away and you will find ease and peace in the spaciousness. From there, a part of you might want to show up, or maybe not. Sometimes parts of us don’t yet feel safe to come out for a clear conversation. It’s important to let that be okay and extend to them all the patience they need without trying to force anything.

Another thing that sometimes happens is another part of you will make you go blank. So I also invite you to gently feel the blankness itself as if it was a part.

What if I go inside and don’t hear anything back from a part?

In addition to the answer to the previous question, I’ll also add: Sometimes our parts need to feel us out more before they feel safe enough to have a conversation.

Instead of trying to force a part to have a conversation with you, ask it if that is something it is available for. If it says no or if it doesn’t respond, just focus on holding the part in loving awareness and compassion. Love, compassion, and curiosity are what build trust.

I don’t always “see” or “hear” something when I talk to a part. Sometimes it is just darkness and a faint sense of knowing they are there or what they might be saying. Is that normal?

Yep! Totally normal.

Some people are more visual and will “see” things clearly. Some people are so auditory it's like they really can hear their parts. And other people can’t see or hear anything at all when they go inside.

You’re not supposed to be experiencing it any differently than you already are, and how you naturally experience your parts is perfectly okay.

What does being “blended” with a part mean?

Being “blended” with a part means that a part of you has taken over your focus so much that it’s like you are seeing through its eyes. All you can feel is how this part feels, all you can think is how this part thinks, and this part has grabbed the mic and is speaking from your own mouth.

We’ve all been there, yeah? It usually happens when our trauma has been triggered or when a situation feels high stakes.

The problem that comes when we are blended with a part of us is that we can’t help it when it has taken us over. So once we notice we are blended (which is a skillset in and of itself), then we can say, “Hey, I see you’re upset and are needing something. Can you give me a little more space in here so I can be with you and help get you what you need?”

The more trust we’ve built with our parts, the quicker they will unblend.

When I go inside, it is super hard to focus on just one part. It’s like all these parts keep interrupting one another. What do I do?

Oh gosh, I’ve so been there. This is also really normal when it comes to getting started and when trying to do parts work around a situation that feels high stakes.

The first thing I recommend in this situation is to not try to talk to any part or figure anything out right away. Just see if you can get to a space where you’re watching all your parts running around or hearing all their chatter or feeling the energy in your body and just, notice for a while.

You might have parts that are yelling at you to try and join them in their panic, but just thank those parts for trying to protect you and go on noticing best you can. Bonus points if you can send them compassion as you are witnessing them, knowing that each and every one of these parts is only ever doing its best to love, be loved, and stay safe.

Eventually, your parts will notice there is someone else in here with a different vibe (you), and they will get curious enough to slow down enough to have a proper conversation with you.

Now that I’ve met a few of my parts, what’s next?

So awesome that you’ve met a few of your parts! You have just started on an incredible journey, my friend. The journey of creating your dream life from the inside out.

You’ve got lots of options.

The first is to check out my course Parts Work Academy. Not because I’m trying to hock my shit, but because I have truly jam-packed this course with so much value and I don’t know of anything else out there like it. There is also a private Facebook community where you’ll be able to connect with more people on their parts work journey.

Another option is to get yourself a parts work practitioner. The IFS Institute has a directory of IFS practitioners you can find here.

I am also available for one-on-one VIP coaching. You can schedule a discovery call with me here.

There are also countless books you can read and Facebook groups you can join that are full of parts work and IFS enthusiasts. I highly encourage you get connected with more people on their parts work journey because this is work we were always meant to do in a community!

So there you have it, everything you need to get started with parts work.

If you haven’t already, download my free Meet A Part Worksheet and meet your first part today!