Everybody Needs Somebunny to Love

A quest to find real love

Children have the capability to love and to need, simultaneously. Because when they love with abandon it’s often because they’re receiving something they also need. Maybe it’s comfort, maybe it’s security, maybe it’s something else.

It’s no wonder so many children gravitate toward certain stuffed animals or soft and cuddly blankets. Things that to the casual observer, are just that — things. But to those in the know, thing is an insult.

Oh, no! These are not things. These are lovies, and lovies are Real.

Especially when we’re young. As we grow up, though, we forget and start to think it’s silly to put value in fluffy material that is stuffed with poly-fill.

We encourage our children to give up lovies at a certain age. What kind of person can grow into a success who also needs the comfort of a lovie? This person will never succeed by societal standards.

As children, we love with abandon. Childhood magic can make stuffed things become real, if only in our minds.

Wouldn’t life be better if we could love with the same abandon when we become adults?

Oh the places you can go — Dr. Seuss

It’s the title of a book, and it opens the imagination to going anywhere.

Or, it’s a silly children’s story.

It allows for the transportation of time and space if you are open to the possibility that anything is possible.

You don’t have to move across time and space. You can move across town or live on the same block your entire life.

When you change your thinking you can change your life.

Travel is anywhere your mind will allow you to go. You get to take your experiences with you, go to new places in new ways, and allow yourself to be improved by the experience.

If I had to pass the idea onto a child, I’d want to pass on the idea of loving the unlovable.

I have one stuffed animal that I’ve had all my life. I received him as a birthday present when I turned two years old. I still smile to think about the picture of me hugging him so tight the stuffing might fall out. I fell in love with him right out of the packaging. In mom’s photo album, there’s me as a cute, chubby-cheeked kid squeezing an upside-down rabbit.

He’s Flippity Floppity — a stuffed rabbit that I poured all my love into. He was my lovie. He used to wear a bright orange shirt that now looks a dingy tan. His eyes used to be bright and painted, but are now solid black (the paint having worn off decades ago). Judging by the different colors of thread, his left arm has been sewn on three different times and his right arm sewn back on at least twice.

Even though he’s in a box today, he deserves to be on a pedestal. During times of joy and love, and especially during times of being afraid, he was with me.

He traveled everywhere with me.

In sickness and in health, he was with me.

I poured love into him until he was repulsively dirty and threadbare and ugly. My parents hid him, put in the refrigerator, and put him in the trash to dispose of him. Every time they tried to dispose of him I saved him and loved him more. I loved him so much that I wanted him to become real, like The Velveteen Rabbit.

Do you know the story?

It’s the story of a little boy who loved his stuffed bunny so much that it became Real. He caught scarlet fever and his parents had all of his toys gathered and thrown into a burn pile.

The boy loved the bunny so much that he willed it to come to life. It hopped out of the burn pile and became a real-life rabbit who played in his backyard. On occasion, the rabbit would visit with the boy as he played.

My velveteen rabbit was so grungy and germ-ridden my parents wanted to take it away.

Mom tried to replace my rabbit with an exact replica. It remained unnamed and unloved because he wasn’t anything like Flippity Floppity, which became his given name. This replacement was stiff, new, and unloved. We hadn’t experienced life together like my faithful friend and I had.

As an adult, I take comfort in knowing I still have my Flippity Floppity. Because I loved in a special way, I can allow my children to love their lovies for as long as they need to love them. When the touch of a lovie is needed it can be easily received.

Lovies don’t go everywhere these days, but they are close enough to be found when there’s a need. We learn and grow differently and if we travel just light enough we can allow our lovies to manifest in whatever way is necessary.

If there’s one thing I could pass onto a child, it’s the gift of loving a stuffed animal so much that it becomes Real.

But, not my Real.

It has to become Real the way the child wants to love and need something. It isn’t something I can pass along in the way that made it real for me.

It’s necessary to pick a lovie and travel with it in a way, and for a long enough time to make it Real for him or her. The story must be personalized for each individual.

How do you love and what did you need as a child that nothing else in the whole world could fulfill?

Love in that way and make it your own personal story.

Keep your life-long friend your whole life, if it feels right, and allow that love to fulfill your needs.

Who is your somebunny to love?