Every Seven Years

Something Happens

Seven has always been a significant number for me. I considered it to be a lucky number.

There were seven members in my family. My parents and the kids. Why not lucky?

Then, there is the thought that all of your skin cells will have completely sloughed off and regrown in seven years, but when I googled it, the results are not true, especially for those companies selling expensive skin replenishment serums. So, the jury is out on that one.

It takes seven years for a fallen-out hair to grow back. I believe this rule does not apply to wild ass hairs in your ears, on your face, or in your eyebrows. Those tend to grow back more quickly, especially if they are on your chin.

There is, of course, the famous seven-year itch. They made a movie with that title starring Marilyn Monroe and Tom Ewell. Remember the famous photo with her dress blown up all around her ears? Yeah, that one.

The theory is in any long-term relationship, there comes a wandering eye around the seven-year point. This can apply to jobs too. You either get over it, or you do something about it. In any case, it is an opportune point to do some introspective work. Make lemonade.

1 to 7 years: In the Catholic faith, a kid reaches the age of reason at age seven. This is where confession and communion happen. I used to make up sins trying to please the priest hearing my confession. My life just wasn’t all that interesting. My husband, though, was an entirely different animal. He’s been entertaining all his life. I could never have gotten away with the stuff he did growing up.

7 to 14 years: Ah, puberty. Remember that? Everything was so incredibly intense. If the world revolved around you at three years old, just wait until you turn 14.

14 to 21 years: You are finally an adult at 21. You can drink, get married, vote, and sign contracts by the time you are 21 years old. I know the ages to reach for all those opportunities are less in some states, but by the time you are 21 years old, you can go anyplace in the United States and not worry. Before that? Yes, be afraid and try not to get caught.

21 to 28 years: Well, most folks are getting married and starting families, I think, during these seven years. I’m guessing, but I’ve always thought that was the case. Twenty-one is also the age when, if you went to a four-year college, you’ve finally earned a degree presuming you graduated high school at 17.

28 to 35 years: Here’s where your proverbial seven-year itch as far as marital stuff goes. “Oh, hell, what have I gotten myself into?” Hey, it happens to everybody. Just work through it. It’s called growing up.

35 to 42 years: This is where the seven-year itch happens to you at work. You begin wondering if this is all it is. When are you going to get promoted? Is there even a chance for that? Aren’t you bored by now? Again, a prime opportunity to develop some hobbies or brush up your resume. You could learn Spanish or German. You could learn to play the piano. You could start writing because, by now, you have had the opportunity to experience a lot of what life has to offer. Still young, but not yet decrepit. Believe me, I know.

It was during the 35 to 42 span of years that I quit drinking, quit smoking, gained 50 pounds, and started psychic channeling. My hair also started going grey.

42 to 49 years: Here’s where you are still plugging away at life. If you are a woman, chances are your FSH levels are going up, and you are sorry you did not have kids. You might have even entered perimenopause. Such a lovely time. Look forward to hot flashes and mood-altering drugs to protect those around you. Also, wild ass hairs start growing on your face. Just saying.

49 to 56 years: You might be getting tired. You’ve worked your way up the career ladder and find yourself supervising a bunch of younger folk who party a lot. It happens on Monday morning you are the only one at work on time. The rest of them come straggling in half an hour late, if at all. It’s a hard time, I think. You get through it.

56 to 63 years: You start getting snippy. You’ve lost patience with many people. It was during this time I hung up on a nasty customer, only to have him call back and ask me if I had hung up on him. I told him yes, and I was going to do it again. I did. I relish the memory. It just gives me warm tingles. You also start thinking about what retirement is going to look like. By now, you have developed bat wings on your arms. It creeps up on you, and you start wearing clothes with sleeves.

63 to 70 years: This is panic time. You have not prepared for retirement, but you are really tired of the rat race by now. This is where having developed all those hobbies ten years ago comes into play. If you are a writer, you have had a good number of years of writing under your belt. So, retire already.

Hardly anybody who has retired has any money. I’m just making a generalized statement. You can start collecting Social Security in the US at age 62. However, you are also only allowed to earn about $1,000 each month before it starts screwing with your Social Security payments. That is until, for me anyway, I reached the age of 66 and 2 months. It changes every year by a month or so.

This is the age I am at right now. Right now, people my age are dropping like flies. It can get depressing. I’m looking at another 20 to 25 years of productivity right now. I think. It’s scary. I guess life is scary. But I can still put on my socks, so that’s something.

70 to 77 years: I haven’t been there yet. However, my husband is currently 75 years old. He slowed down a little bit, which was difficult for him to do. But this has allowed him to concentrate more on the reading and writing he loves. I just leave him alone, but I know he is happy, which makes me happy.

77 to 84 years: Again, I don’t know, seeing as how I haven’t reached this plateau yet. I’m probably going to be taking regular naps.

So, that is life in seven-year intervals. If you’ve made it past 84 and are still writing, I’d love to hear how you are doing. And congratulations.

Thanks for reading.

Pauline Evanosky is a psychic channel, and no, I can’t tell what you are thinking. I am a retired office admin person, a bookkeeper at times, and a writer. Soon to be published in 2023 a series of books for young folks about Getting a Job, Keeping a Job, and Looking for Another Job. I’ve written almost 300 articles on Medium and would love it if you would subscribe to my stuff. I don’t like to get dressed anymore and have a fabulous disposition, as long as they don’t take away my pills.