Embracing our Shadow Self with Storytelling (Runaway by 100 Gecs)

100 Gecs introduced me to the world of hyper pop (one of my current special interests). Their songs have influenced me to start branching out more in the music that I consume. For example, metal music used to overwhelm me but lately I have been appreciating it with more ease. To me, 100 Gecs is like a gateway drug to absurd and experimental art.

One of the qualities that I enjoy most about their music is in their ability to create stories with characters that aren’t all that likable. For example, their System of a Down influenced song “Billy Knows Jamie” on their 10,000 Gecs record tells a story about a man who gets deadly when he smokes crack.(The music video is wild also!)

The song that I chose today is one of my favorites when it comes to character development. Each verse displays the main character unraveling further and further into their immaturity. I find this downward spiral brings humanity and relatablilty to their story.

“I run

Caught in a moment

Caught in a dream

That wasn’t for me

So I run (so I run)

Caught in a landslide (landslide)

Caught in a rainstorm

And this storm won’t break

I’ll run, faster and faster

I’ll run, feel like we’re taking this backwards now

I don’t want anything else

Only you (faster and faster)”

The first verse starts out with lyrics of running towards someone. The soft piano background makes the listener feel at ease and whimsical in a way.

“Why you doing this?

You said we’d never run

Now you’re talking bad

I’m the setting sun”

Tension builds until the second verse abruptly changes style to a more chaotic punk pop sound. The lyrics show the character in the song feels betrayed by their partner and they start lashing out. I love the line “I’m the setting sun”. It makes me picture the main character in a frantic insecure state telling their ex how they are missing out on the best thing that’s ever happened to them.

“I, don’t

Need you anymore

You think, you were

Everything I wanted

Never thought of you

I don’t even care

You think you’re always right

I can tell you’re always wrong

Whatcha talking ‘bout?

Whatcha trying to say?

Are you having fun?

I’m laughing everyday ‘cause”

The chorus and the verses that follow shows the main character in a full on defensive state. They are completely rejecting the person who they were just swooning over in the first verse, which displays immaturity in how they are handling the break up.

This kind of approach to song writing inspires me to write more from my shadow self.

A shadow self is the part of a person that they try to hide or repress.

This can be a part of ourselves that brings us a lot of shame. I’ve been writing poems as my shadow self and it has been really cathartic to lean into sides of myself that I didn’t feel like I could express before. Some emotions that I’ve had fun running with lately are jealousy, insecurity, and defensiveness. While I don’t express these sides of myself to others frequently, it’s felt freeing to give them free rein in my writing. It has helped me understand myself as a complex human more.

What did you think of the song? :)

Check out my Spotify playlist here!

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