avatarJennifer Barrios Tettay

Summary

A mother recounts the profound impact of her son's birth on March 31, 2009, and how his arrival with Down Syndrome on April Fool's Day transformed her life.

Abstract

The narrative describes the emotional journey of a mother awaiting the birth of her son via C-section on April Fool's Day. She reflects on the loneliness of the pregnancy, with the baby's father absent, and the mixed emotions of excitement and fear. The birth of her son, Brian, who has Down Syndrome, is depicted as a moment of pure joy and love, despite the initial health scare due to her own reaction to the surgery. The author cherishes the unique qualities of each of her children, emphasizing the special bond she shares with her newborn. The article is the first in a series that documents the life-changing experience of raising a child with Down Syndrome.

Opinions

  • The author expresses a deep connection with her unborn child, feeling his presence and movements during the pregnancy.
  • She conveys a sense of peace and confidence upon holding her daughter for the first time, highlighting the tender and caring nature of her children.
  • The author values the support of her mother during the birth, suggesting that maternal presence is underrated and should be the norm.
  • She describes her son's birth as a beautiful and heartfelt experience, despite the challenges, and emphasizes the transformative impact of her son's arrival on her life.
  • The author hints at a societal expectation for the father to be present at birth, but she personally finds comfort and strength in her mother's support.
  • The article is written with a sense of advocacy for understanding and embracing the journey of raising a child with Down Syndrome.

DOWN SYNDROME | KNOW THYSELF, HEAL THYSELF

Down Syndrome — GoodBye April’s Fools Day, Welcome Life 2.0

First Entry.

Image by Michal Jarmoluk from Pixabay

How this child turned our world upside down.

The time of waiting was over now.

It was on March 31, 2009, and the last day in my mother’s house. The time of waiting was over now.

I had felt lonely during the past months. This was partly because the Dad-to-be was still in his home country in South America and would not be present for the birth either.

And yet I was not alone.

Again and again, this little man nudged playfully against my abdominal wall. Sometimes this was a very fun pastime and I enjoyed the private moments between my son and me.

My bag was packed, I would spend the coming night in the hospital.

“Hopefully I’ll get some sleep at all, hopefully, the night will pass quickly.”

The C-section was scheduled for the next day, first thing in the morning. And I can assure you, it was the doctors who had picked the 1st of April.

April’s Fools Day.

A strange date. And a special date for a special baby.

By now we were in the car. We live in a rural area, and it takes almost half an hour to drive to the small town where the hospital is located. I was fighting off my nausea.

The slowly blooming spring landscape passed us by, it was a sunny day. The sky was so clear, but unfortunately, I could hardly enjoy the impressions of nature. I felt so sick.

I’m not even sure if my memories of this trip are actually real. Maybe it was gray and cloudy? But when I think of that drive, just a day before I would hold my baby, I think of fields of a sea of flowers and bright sunshine.

At some point, every morning dawns.

As expected, I slept rather poorly than well, but at some point, every morning dawns. My mom went to sleep at home, but she was back to me on time.

It was my third child and my third C-section. The first birth ended in complete anesthesia, I remember it as quite chaotic and only fragmentary. The second, on the other hand, went without complications.

The nurses were preparing me for surgery and the whole process just seemed so surreal. It was like I was standing next to myself and wasn’t really present.

I wasn’t ready — and yet — a part of me was.

The little man in my belly must have been asleep because everything was quiet.

I wondered if it was okay to disturb the peacefully resting child. One of many thoughts that were floating around in my head.

Image by Marjon Besteman from Pixabay

The spinal anesthesia followed. Then the operating table.

Paralyzed abdominally, I only felt it shake and shiver, it was strange. My mother talked to me, which distracted me.

In fact, she was the best support I ever had and could have ever asked for. Why can’t that be the norm? It should be!

It may be based on a romantic concept of having the child's father present at the birth. And the truth is it’s a magical moment for the dad-to-be as well.

But when I’m scared, I need my mom.

I had never heard anything more beautiful.

Then the most wonderful thing happened. His voice immediately entered directly my heart and tears of joy gently enveloped my soul. I had never heard anything more beautiful.

Foto by author

Like every first encounter with my children, this one was unique.

My first son was born over 20 years ago with deep blue-colored eyes.

When I think of how he always looked at his world mindfully and with exploratory curiosity, his eyes remind me of an ocean, only brighter.

And when he looked at you, those magical eyes told stories, as if they were trying to tell you that the world was full of unimagined possibilities waiting for you. Countless mysteries on a horizon that promised infinite freedom.

I still remember the numerous compliments, such as during a vacation in Mallorca, when two elderly ladies admired his “incredible blue eyes” with great detail.

And my daughter?

She was born only two years after her brother. When I held my beautiful, adorable girl in my arms for the first time, I was overcome by a deep sense of peace and confidence.

The little child gave off an aura of tenderness that wrapped itself around the tormented soul like a warming blanket.

Even today, she is the kind of person with whom one experiences pure comfort.

Suitably, she learned in elderly care and is currently furthering her education in a children’s hospital. Without a doubt, she has found her true profession in caring for others.

And now my baby’s angelic crying completely made me lose my composure. Welcome, Brian. 💕

I got Brian placed on my arm and all thoughts were blown away. My mom admired his little ears — she always liked little ears on babies — and there we were. Until I started to feel sick again.

Intense emotion coupled with blood loss is not compatible. They took Brian away from me in time before I threw up. How it went on after that, I don’t know anymore.

Finally, we were alone.

Later, when the surgery was over, we waited in the examination room for the children’s doctor. The orange walls transformed the daylight into a pleasant warmth, finally, we were alone.

Just my mom, my soundly sleeping baby, and me.

Only moments ago, one of the nurses said goodbye, “The pediatrician just wants to take another look at the little one, he’ll be right in!”

I thought nothing of it and enjoyed the idyllic peace.

First Entry — end.

Second Entry:

Collection of all entries:

That was the first part of my story — or rather, the story of my youngest son and how he changed our lives forever.

I hope you, dear reader, enjoyed it.

It's a story of heart — and a very personal one at that.

Not a member yet?

Membership allows unlimited access — not only to my articles but to the articles of all authors on Medium! Great, right? Signing up is easy! Just follow the path into a world of infinite knowledge and endless possibilities and sign here for only $5 per month!

Image of the text divider by the author, created with the open source software Excalidraw.

Parenting
Children
Special Needs
Down Syndrome
Pregnancy
Recommended from ReadMedium