Why Don’t Tell Your Plans to Anyone?

Why telling your plans to others hinders more than it helps?

There’s no denying that when we have a very good idea and a plan to make it a reality, the urge to rush and share it with someone is strong, often uncontrollable. I, myself, have a tendency to talk a lot about this, despite there being plenty of reasons to refrain.

In this article, we’ll explore valid reasons not to make a habit of this and, in unavoidable situations, how we can handle it in a way that doesn’t affect us as much, regardless of how others view our dreams or plans.

Where I Come From

Where I come from, people are generally encouraged not to talk about their plans to others due to the envy that certain individuals may develop. Instead of motivating or joining others to achieve something greater, they prefer to envy.

In some areas, people even go as far as taking the lives of others for better job positions, further reinforcing the conviction that it’s not a good idea to share our plans with others.

Being African, not that this is a characteristic solely of Africa, but in Africa, many people are closely linked to witchcraft. Thus, many resort to this practice to disrupt or eliminate individuals who hold superior social positions or who simply have plans and dreams in life.

But it may be that you don’t have to deal with anything like this where you live; nevertheless, there are still good reasons not to share our plans with others.

Why Not Share?

1. Negative Energy

A good reason not to share our plans with others is that the dream and a plan begin within us, and no one will dream exactly as we do. Until we turn the abstract into concrete, the dream into reality, at least the initial steps in its construction, people won’t understand our motivations and intentions. What follows this?

Some people simply say they don’t believe in plans or dreams, and that’s fine. But others go further, ending up demotivating us, emphasizing that it’s impossible, that we should be doing something else. Stop and think a bit: how many things that bring you great pleasure, happiness, and good results do you do now that you’ve listened to negative things from others?

Another aspect is that people often only have themselves as a reference and conclude that if they didn’t achieve, we won’t either. Such advice isn’t particularly realistic because we might have some ability or knowledge that was lacking to finally fulfill that dream or plan.

2. Self-Sabotage

Yes, that cliché that we are our worst enemies is true; we can sabotage ourselves on the journey to achieve our plans. But here, I won’t mention depreciative things we say to ourselves to discourage us from chasing what we want. The problem here is also talking to others. And no, not talking about negative things about ourselves in the hope that other people will confirm our incompetence. The trap is far less obvious than many of us perhaps perceive.

Let’s illustrate by making a comparison: Masturbation and sex share something in common, both have pleasure as their purpose, but sex also aims for reproduction or fertilization to generate life, which does not exist in masturbation. There is also the fact that in masturbation, fictitious scenarios generally need to be created, whereas sex is something real between two real people.

What do I mean? Sharing our plans and dreams with others doesn’t actually produce anything, but it gives us pleasure, and that’s where the danger lies. Just as someone can become addicted to masturbation and no longer feel pleasure with real sex, the pleasure that comes from sharing our plans and fantasizing or thinking too much about them can take away the pleasure of actually acting towards our plans. Yes, “mental masturbation” is real.

I admit that despite having a big mouth, I consider myself a “lone wolf”. Quite contradictory. And it’s even more strange since someone drew my attention to this and helped me improve. I still need to improve a lot; I’m seriously considering therapy because my need to talk about what I intend to do might be an attempt to fill some gap I have.

I hope this has helped, and I’d be happy to know your opinion on the matter.

Good journey, my dear friends!