Shrinkage — It’s a Guy Thing — Y

Don’t Look Now — But I Think I’m Evolving

I am not sure if this is in my best interests

Things being easier is not the worst thing in the world, right? Making life effortless, you would assume would be a positive thing, as well. Yet, I’m not so sure the less laborious, new, and improved ways of existing are all that good for us.

A song released back in 1969 by these two long-haired hippie dudes from Lincoln, Nebraska, hit the nail on the head about our evolution if we keep seeking the most effortless forms of life. The artists were, Denny Zager and Rick Evans — the title of their insightful tune was “In The Year 2525”

I provided two links to the song. The link with the photo is of them performing the number. The second link is a remake of the song. The vocals are by a superb artist — Jane Rossi and the video helps to make the words come alive.

This musical masterpiece made me think about the future more than any other song I know — a future that is surprisingly changing as we speak.

Ironically, we are evolving in a way that is quite unusual. Recent studies have shown that the Y chromosome — the chromosome that makes a boy a boy — is shrinking. (1)

“WTF?”— “I know!”

We are changing all the way down to our lowest common denominator — our genes. Before long, women will not only inherit the Earth but they will get the house too.

Things that were once taken for granted will disappear, such as writing our names in the snow after a beer or two.

Men are true artists with their instruments when scribing their signature into the pristine white snow — regardless of the size of their pen — so to speak.

It is a fact that girls simply cannot write their names in the snow as well as boys. This is because they keep stepping on the letter they just wrote when moving to write the next letter.

Ergo, here is an art form that will die with our gender. Sad but true — along with many other gender-specific traits.

Granted, things will also improve like no more serial rapists and awful pickup lines. I guess there would also be fewer instances of spousal abuse, fewer murders, fewer wars, and —

Oh, God hurry up and take our nasty asses.

Anyway, it is interesting to know nature has chosen men to die off. I guess it is smart, we do cause an abundance of problems in society and act like children most of the time.

If you think about it, women do not need the male species anymore — running around and mucking things up — especially since YouTube came into the picture.

Hell, women have been learning to fix everything for themselves for years. They can remedy anything from leaky toilets, and changing out car batteries, to replacing a thermocouple in a water heater — and they learned in the same fashion men did — by watching YouTube videos.

Sorry guys, but we will vanish off the face of the Earth and the first thing uttered will be a woman saying, “Do you smell that?” As another woman replies, “No! What smell?”

“The smell of a room without dirty socks and a fart still lingering in the air from last night’s poker game.” She answers.

The ladies giggle and then proceed to fix the world.

The elimination of man through the will of the universe is fine by me but ladies don’t get in too big of a hurry for our deportation out of humanity. The reports state it could take a couple of million years before every swinging dick has vanished into thin air.

However, those massive beasts of burden we carry around with us between our legs like a pinata may start to get smaller and smaller as we step into the future.

There may even be a time when we begin to look more like animals with internal genitalia such as birds or reptiles. Then where will the fun be in the morning, you ask —I know I will be crushed without my little buddy staring up at me with that one good eye as I greet the day.

Guys, you know what I mean.

Evolution is simply not our friend gentlemen, and yet we are all prisoners of its curse. So, what to do? — “Guy Things”— that’s what to do!

I just started doing guy things by farting in my chair — cool huh? OOPS — kind of stinky! That’s okay, I sort of like it — it’s a guy thing. LOL

Well, I think it is time to go. This Darwin duty can be quite tiring when trying to go extinct. I think I’ll head into the bedroom to admire my X and Y chromosomes for a while and do some more guy things.

Wink, Wink!

That’s right, watch rerun Super Bowl games on the NFL channel. Woo — Woo! Yabba Dabba Doo!

You know those ladies are going to miss our goofy butts when we’re gone.

Alright, maybe not!

Reference

(1) Why Y bye-bye? Is the Y chromosome disappearing and will men really go extinct? — Genetics Unzipped

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