Don’t Let a Hungry Ghost Eat at Your Table

Hungry ghosts make energy vampires look tame. They feed off fear and are spreading like wildfire in their lust for power.

Hungry Ghost: “In Buddhism, hungry ghosts are often seen as a metaphor for those individuals who are following a path of incorrect desire, who suffer from spiritual emptiness, who cannot see the impossibility of correcting that which has already happened or who form an unnatural attachment to the past.” Definition by Kashgar

She knocked and I opened the door to that last hungry ghost in my life. A long term client in my Healing Arts practice had given her my number after numerous requests.

My client called right after her referral and left a message, “This person is high maintenance but you’ll be able to handle her.” She was not familiar with sophisticated hungry ghosts. I thought I was.

I received a full body scan, which included my therapy room, as soon as she entered my space. I wondered how I measured up in her comparisons, observing the instant calculations flashing behind veiled eyes.

Hungry ghosts prefer to gather information rather than offering it. Energy vampires swoop in without disguise. Their message is plain and simple. I need to feed and your energy will do for now. They become easily sated in the moment and drift off in hunt of the next buffet.

Hungry ghosts however, have been rewarded for their behavior and hone their disguises to perfection. This woman was a Master.

Very soon I learned how brilliant she was. Facts doled out in an understated manner. One must not appear to be the narcissist one truly is. A Fullbright scholar with a host of advanced degrees. A successful law practice. Owner and principle lawyer alongside her husband. Multiple properties. Three high achieving children being raised by a loving nanny. Yada yada.

I was curious. What did she want from me? I kept my boundaries strong and clear for a couple years of probing attempts to mine my experiences for enhancements in her life.

Her husband and daughter became clients as well. Increasing her desire to infiltrate a small group of clients I also saw as social friends. A tricky border, but I had previous good fortune in my choices.

A moment of clarity finally arrived. She was a spiritual devourer, the most highly skilled of hungry ghosts. Top of the line adepts with the skills to mask their insatiable forces. She would’ve made an excellent Unsupreme Court Judge.

I had been studying for years with an extraordinary Sound Healer before hungry ghost’s arrival. She gleaned a few facts and began questioning me about my teacher. Upon discovering I would be out of town for during a retreat offering, she announced she and her husband would be attending.

She couldn’t wait to share her critique, rushing in the door earlier than her scheduled time. “He’s the real McCoy, your teacher. I can spot them right away.” Like I needed her confirmation to seal the deal. Hubris to the max.

And then…..there it came, greed. “I know you signed up for his Myanmar tour. Would you mind if I joined? I traveled there years ago and would love to return.”

What could I say? No, you can’t come because I don’t trust you and I prefer you not enter my Sangha [spiritual community] territory. I don’t work like that and she knew it.

I was less than my normal enthusiastic self however. Even though she picked up on my body language, it was disregarded. It didn’t suit her aim. And so the sword began to lower.

Spiritual realms are the most highly regarded places in my life. It’s sacred heart space where I let my light shine and my defenses take a break. I remained confident I could keep her at bay during this retreat.

I was wrong.

We had no sooner arrived at our hotel when she approached me with the first of non stop petitions. “Lets put money in a mutual purse. You can handle it. I’m bad with foreign exchange. My husband usually manages it.”

She thrust a wad of bills at me. She was wealthy and made sure she had donated an ample amount of money to one of my teacher’s projects before our trip. Her hungry ghost rally for the, do you see me and how powerful I am?

I was an autonomous person and her move took me off center. We left for the streets where she began to consume goods, calling for ‘our’ purse with every transaction.

I ended her arrangement two hours later. “I’m not your husband. You’re going to have learn money exchange.” After her financial program failed, she started in on a new tack. “I constantly get lost. I have no sense of direction. Keep your eye on me so I don’t wander okay.”

I ignored this request and went my own way, forcing her to keep her eye on me. She was not pleased. I was proving a difficult subject.

Endless daily probing ensued. When was I going to practice yoga? Could she join me?

One time she came running when she saw me doing hip stretches at a makeshift bar. She threw her leg up onto the rail, crashing into me in the process and throwing us both down to the floor. I was in an extreme posture and would’ve been injured if I hadn’t been flexible.

She craved the friendship I had with our teacher and the easy going familiarity I shared with others in the group, many of whom I had met during previous retreats.

One night our teacher went into trance. All of us could see he was in an altered state and had entered a Mystic zone. His wife was seated next to him and advised us it was a prime opportunity to ask any question we had.

A few people queried and so did I. I summoned up courage and exposed myself to the group by asking about a spiritual transmission which took place when I was 20 years old. It changed the course of my life.

My teacher knew exactly what I was describing and explained how it was a high initiation in the Priestess temples of ancient Egypt. It had reappeared as a reminder of my true course. I felt the truth of his answer resonate in my body and was glad I had asked.

It was very dark when we left the meeting and a small group of us were stumbling our way back to our rooms. Hungry ghost slithered to my side like the snake she was and commented loudly enough for our group to hear.

“You must’ve done something really bad to fall from such grace in a previous life and have ended up where you are.”

I felt tender and open. This hurt. It sunk deeply and infected the profound gratitude I was experiencing moments before. I had never shared this vision in front of a group and now I knew why. Spiritual jealousy reared its ugly head and the bite landed in my protected haven.

All of us turned and looked at her, temporarily speechless. This was highly unacceptable behavior in a Sangha community. She registered the disapproval and immediately tried to pretend it was a joke. No one believed her.

By the end of our three week trip hungry ghost had tried every trick in her book. She wanted to bring me down and continued aggressively cruising for a spiritual bruising. She craved my essence of Being. She was used to getting what she wanted.

I could barely tolerate her presence and stayed away from her when possible. As soon as we arrived back in the States, I sent her an email and told her I was no longer able to work with her. Our energy did not resonate.

She wouldn’t take no for an answer and barraged me with emails. Couldn’t I just get together for coffee and hear her side of the story? No, I could not.

I divorced her from my life without ghosting her. I explained my decision and why I wouldn’t change my mind and would no longer respond to her emails. I immediately felt enormous relief. My lesson had been learned. I was moving on, wounded but intact.

Hungry ghost is an ancient descriptor and has existed as long as our first world cultures. The original definition of a hungry ghost emerged from a Sanskrit word called Preta. It eventually spread to all religions in Asia and each country held a specific definition fitting their culture.

In Japan they are called gaki and are confined to eating excrement. Spoiled children or brats can be labeled gaki as well. Close relatives in the hungry ghost family are called jikininki and they are cursed to devour corpses.

In Hinduism, Preta have an endless desire for the objects, character traits or emotions of others. They lust after the things which obsessed them while living.

Christian mythology created a form of hungry ghost known as the Grigori and reference them in the Book of Enoch. Grigori mated with humans and created offspring with an endless appetite but no mouth to eat with. They are doomed to wander with an insatiable hunger that can never be satisfied.

In China, hungry ghosts include the spirits of dead ancestors who must return to Earth in the seventh month of the Chinese Lunar calendar in August. These ghosts can eat and drink but the living wear amulets to ward off possible evil intent.

In the West, hungry ghosts are connected to the rituals in Halloween. The candle in jack o lanterns is a welcome signal to departed loved ones but the lantern itself is a warning to those of evil intent.

The same is true on the November 1st Day of the Dead celebrations in Latin America. Communion with ancestors is honored and celebrated on this day but skeletons are featured as hungry ghosts and warnings to the living.

Native American tribes had their form of ghosting and it is here where the modern term originated. If a tribal member committed a taboo act they would be evicted by a community agreement to not acknowledge the transgressor in any form.

Food would not be shared. No eye contact would be made. A ghosted individual could be residing among the tribe, but was as good as dead. No one can live like this for very long. The ghosted left the tribe of their own accord.

Psychologist Carl Jung embraced all of these hungry ghost descriptions by lumping them into one group and identifying them as our human Shadow, both collectively and individually.

Fear is gaining more traction in our everyday reality. It’s always served as a control factor, but the pandemic set a new high bar for its destructive and pervasive effects.

Hungry ghosts thrive on fear and subtle oppression. It’s the energy which breaks us down and creates an opening for their entry.

It’s important to identify a hungry ghost if they are operating in your personal world. If you’re involved in a spiritual community or on the lookout for a spiritual teacher, you can become a primary target for unscrupulous individuals claiming to have abilities they don’t possess.

Spiritually knowledgeable teachers are often very humble. They are walking their talk and their ‘knowing’ is obvious for all to see. They never use fear as a stimulus.

Hungry ghosts are flourishing in present reality. Learn how to identify these ill intentioned people and remove them from your life. They will offer gifts to lure you in. Hone your radar and send them back to their own mirrors. This is a service to all.

Remember the old adage: Do not share your pearls with swine. There’s a reason it became a popular saying and it can be applied to many of the devourers among us.

Follow Your Truth and you will find your road back home. Trust that and be well my friends.