Programmers’ Life

Don’t Just Code, But Also C…

A tribute to my dear friend who has inspired me to code

I owe my passion for coding to a very dear friend of mine, who inspired me to excel in learning so much on computer during my youth. Under his tutelage, my knowledge about computer expands beyond computer gaming.

It is unfortunate he passed away in his mid-20s, believed to have taken his own life, felling off from a multistories apartment.

I still remember vividly on his 21st birthday at his house, his dad sarcastically wishes him a happy birthday in front of his friends, saying “Now you have grown up, you can play computer games more fiercely”.

In his teens’ age, other than sleeping and schooling, he will be in front of his Intel 286 computer monitor, fingers on the keyboard, and mouse. Computer gaming, hacking, coding, whatever one can do with the machine.

A cheerful youth he was became a socially isolated individual with just the computer as his closest companion. His ability to interact with others become awkward during his later years.

Sad that he is now gone. He has missed out so much in life other than being with computer. I felt guilty, not able to advise him about life is not just playing with the computer. I was equally naive back then.

Now actively blogging on software development, I owe this community telling there are more things in life other than coding…

Connecting with community and socially active

We are a social creature. This is just natural to most people.

For those who engrossed in computing activities, sitting in front of a computer for hours becomes part of our life. Deattaching from it is difficult. A conscious effort to do other things is required.

Chat with friends and families

Take some time, and call up friends or family members. Gathering with them and do something that is not needing a computer.

Ask about how they are doing. Get interested in people.

I have to admit, I am an introvert and relatively self-centered when I was younger. But as I aged, I start to realize how much I have missed out in life.

Knowing what people love, and good at will also benefit oneself. You know who to learn from whenever you are in some situation. And best of all, you make real friends. That’s liberating.

Compromise and tolerate

In every social relationship, there are bounce to have different opinions, conflict, and misunderstanding.

Coder are more inclined to be logical and treating things as clear 0 or 1. Hence this could make relationships sour easier when one doesn’t step out of one’s view and comprehend there are illogical explanations in life.

Life is not just shades of grey, but also colorful. A seemingly bad situation may turn out to be a blessing in disguise. There’s a saying, “lose to win”. We lost in the argument, but win back the heart and rebuild the relationship.

Character building and self-improvement

Coding and programming is a very disciplined and demanding field. Many hours of hard work is required for one to excel and succeed. And most of all it requires passion.

Nonetheless, we are human. We need more than a job and career to be a more wholesome person, and enjoy life better.

Let’s start with the simple one.

Cooking and enjoy some meal

Like it or not, we have to eat to live.

Some people have this mantra, “Live to Eat”. While it is not totally right, it has some value to it.

Get away from your computer when you are about to take a meal. Enjoy it properly. Better still plan for it, and try to get different to taste from time to time. Fully enjoy the taste, the texture, the smell… close your eyes and indulge yourself in it.

Try cooking. It does bring satisfaction and flavor to life. One will treasure a good meal after had cooked before. Even if you did not turn out to be a good cook, you will appreciate enjoying good food more.

Calories controlling and exercising

Eating is nice. It’s easy to enjoy a good one. But it has side effects 😓

Exercising is a necessary pain one has to pursue to reap the joy of it. If you enjoy some physical games and have fellow friends to play with, that’s great.

But as we age, we need something that is daily, sustainable, and not reliance on others or environments for us to continue doing it. Such exercises needed only one thing, discipline.

No pain, no gain. The gain not only having a good feeling after exercising but also we will be mentally alert, confident, and able to do coding better 😅.

Camping, traveling, … do something outside

Not only should one leave the computer sometimes, one should get out of a regular routine, doing something totally different, and preferably in a totally different environment.

This is definitely not something to do daily. But could be a weekly activity, or monthly, and having a major annual event.

Plan for it. Get outside. Get some Vitamin D from the sun. It’s rejuvenating and will bring some inspiration in life that you normally will not get.

Cry, laugh, get emotional… feel your heart

One thing that technology cannot replace human (at least yet), is our emotion. If we detach ourselves totally from our emotions, we are nothing but just another object on earth.

Human is a special creature. We need to get emotional. Properly channel these emotions will bring out the better of us. Those could be the moment of inspiration, and enlightenment one gets. One will find it connect to nature better, and find the purpose of life better.

Caring for others

With emotion, we can understand and empathy. It’s no longer logic 0 or 1 as mentioned earlier. We can suddenly find ourselves is no longer an individual, but are all connected. We can relate, comfort, and strengthen each other. And we will be cared for, comforted, and strengthen as well.

We cry with those who cry, and genuinely happy with the success of others. Whatever affect others, is related to us.

Cherish the relationship

Like it or not, we have been created to have affection. Express your feeling appropriately, to make it known. Doesn’t matter how that turns out, you have done your part. There may not be a second chance if you just keep it to yourself.

If there is an ongoing relationship, treasure it. Spend time with each other. Doing something both love today, and enjoy the moments. Ultimately at the end of one life, these are all that counts.

I have been rambling much. Give yourself a pat at the back if you read until here. In reality, if you manage to read so far, you are probably fine.

As a programmer, we have friends around us who love computers and engrossed in it immensely. They might turn out fine as I thought about how my friend might turn out. Or they might not.

Hence I hope we can play a part in lookout for those at risk, and tactfully aid them. The action we did might save life without us even knowing it.

Thank you.