Don’t Give Up — Have a Big Dream, Just Let Go of Your “How”

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Abstract

e scary to hit send, I felt very confident in my submissions. I say this because I had never really felt that sort of confidence in anything I had done in my life. I felt in complete alignment with it. I was going to be one of the winners. Hell, I might have to choose between the two!</p><p id="ddcf">The day Hay House announced I was thinking about how I was going to feel if I got second or third prize, which were self-publishing packages, instead of the contract with Hay House. I was not thinking about how I would feel if … my name wasn’t there at all.</p><h1 id="9ad4">As you’ve probably guessed by now — my name wasn’t there at all.</h1><p id="636e">Cue expletives and a few tears. Oh well, I’ve still got the other contest results — must be a better deal for me there!</p><p id="6d72">Just a few days later I was attending a Facebook “party” where they would announce the winners of this second contest one by one. I sat with my housemate, obsessively refreshing the screen, only to see other people’s names rolling by. I knew this was only because I was going to win the grand prize.</p><p id="12f7">Finally there it was, the last announcement. I scroll down and … SOME GUY’S NAME IS THERE!</p><h1 id="5715">What?!?! There has to be some mistake! I was so sure. I knew my proposals didn’t suck…</h1><h1 id="6861">…or did they???</h1><p id="a93c">More expletives and a lot more tears. Self-doubt rolled in strong as all the possible reasons why I didn’t get chosen flew through my mind, the last one being, maybe my writing <b><i>does suck.</i></b></p><h1 id="47b9">I don’t particularly like good and bad labels, but that was a bad place for me to go

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. Thankfully I realized it pretty quickly.</h1><p id="9d6e">Sure, I had a couple of days of feeling crushed— I needed to process through that, as it was a deeply disappointing situation. But now I feel so much gratitude as I write this, because instead of getting stuck in the self-doubt and disappointment, I realized I had a choice.</p><p id="fc08">The person I once was would have taken this rejection to heart. She would have known it was the Universe confirming that she did in fact suck, really as a person in general, and who did she think she was for even trying to enter this writing arena? Don’t quit your day job! Panic sets in, because she already has. She is totally screwed!</p><p id="2f0f">I am so grateful that today not only do I know, but I really <i>feel </i>deep in my heart, that the Universe has my back.</p><p id="2065">I am grateful that I went on to finish writing my book, unaware of how I would get it published.</p><p id="da85">I am grateful that took a leap and self published, with too many <i>I don’t know hows </i>to count, and the finished product came out better than I expected.</p><p id="e4f8">I finally got it through my head that I don’t have to know how anything is going to play out — that’s the Universe’s department. I just have to keep taking action, and continue to focus on and appreciate everything that is already working so perfectly in my life.</p><h1 id="227a">So please, dream big and take action. Just leave your hows out of it.</h1><p id="d905"><a href="https://medium.com/@geirwin/subscribe"><i>Don’t miss a thing — subscribe to receive my stories as soon as they’re published.</i></a></p></article></body>

Gwen Irwin, You are … NOT the Winner!

Oops — spoiler alert.

A couple of years ago had two opportunities that I was super excited about, and quite frankly counting on. Because I attended a Hay House Writer’s Workshop I had an opportunity to submit a book proposal that they would actually look at, with the possibility of winning a publishing contract with them. On top of that I attended an online writer’s conference that also offered a contest with several publishing prizes, one of which was with New World Library who has published Eckhart Tolle.

I decided this was it — this was how I was going to get my big break as a writer.

I could see it happening — I believed I would be the winner of one of these contests. I did daily visualization. And I took massive action — I learned how to do a proper book proposal and then I wrote two, exactly as each wanted, and produced some, in my opinion, pretty strong material. I hired an editor and did more tweaking, fixing, and rewriting. Then I sent them off.

Although it was a little scary to hit send, I felt very confident in my submissions. I say this because I had never really felt that sort of confidence in anything I had done in my life. I felt in complete alignment with it. I was going to be one of the winners. Hell, I might have to choose between the two!

The day Hay House announced I was thinking about how I was going to feel if I got second or third prize, which were self-publishing packages, instead of the contract with Hay House. I was not thinking about how I would feel if … my name wasn’t there at all.

As you’ve probably guessed by now — my name wasn’t there at all.

Cue expletives and a few tears. Oh well, I’ve still got the other contest results — must be a better deal for me there!

Just a few days later I was attending a Facebook “party” where they would announce the winners of this second contest one by one. I sat with my housemate, obsessively refreshing the screen, only to see other people’s names rolling by. I knew this was only because I was going to win the grand prize.

Finally there it was, the last announcement. I scroll down and … SOME GUY’S NAME IS THERE!

I don’t particularly like good and bad labels, but that was a bad place for me to go. Thankfully I realized it pretty quickly.

Sure, I had a couple of days of feeling crushed— I needed to process through that, as it was a deeply disappointing situation. But now I feel so much gratitude as I write this, because instead of getting stuck in the self-doubt and disappointment, I realized I had a choice.

The person I once was would have taken this rejection to heart. She would have known it was the Universe confirming that she did in fact suck, really as a person in general, and who did she think she was for even trying to enter this writing arena? Don’t quit your day job! Panic sets in, because she already has. She is totally screwed!

I am so grateful that today not only do I know, but I really feel deep in my heart, that the Universe has my back.

I am grateful that I went on to finish writing my book, unaware of how I would get it published.

I am grateful that took a leap and self published, with too many I don’t know hows to count, and the finished product came out better than I expected.

I finally got it through my head that I don’t have to know how anything is going to play out — that’s the Universe’s department. I just have to keep taking action, and continue to focus on and appreciate everything that is already working so perfectly in my life.