Don’t Drown In Your Stuff, Learn How To Let Go

Letting go is the best gift to healing thy self

It’s one thing to grow the balls to confront your emotional garbage and bring it into your consciousness. It’s a whole another thing to explore it, reflect, and then let it go so that you may grow.

Often, we are in what I like to call ‘matrix-mode’. People are looking for a quick fix. Why? Because our emotional baggage is heavy, feels awkward and uncomfortable. It’s human nature to avoid feeling and experiencing pain. No one puts their hand up for that.

If we haven’t been responsible for your stuff for a while, then it’s highly likely that it has piled up and you’ve got some work to do. You might be feeling physically flat, mentally unproductive or your confidence is a little poorly.

After years of spiritual journey work, walking the path to my own space of inner peace, I’ve learnt a few things which aren’t actively taught in mainstream books or classes. I’ve learnt you stumble. You fall over and scab your knees. You can sob for days and never run out of tears. You can exhaust yourself trying to understand all the feels, but this doesn’t allow you to heal.

I’ve learnt from this spiritual practice, how not to wallow in my stuff. I see triggers now as the gift that they are, perceptions of an experience. They are not my truth. I have a gift for jumping in the deep end of the cesspool of my stuff, doing the work and emerging cleaner on the other side of the pond.

Renown authors such as Louise Hay and Dr Wayne Dyer discuss within their myriad of published work, that our bodies store emotional blockages. This is because emotions are energy, and when not correctly expressed out, or processed, become a source of energy blockage. Left untreated, these blockages can manifest into dis-ease.

Cellular Biologist and author of “Biology Of Belief: Unleashing the power of consciousness”, Bruce Lipton takes this further claiming that physical symptoms can be considered symptoms of how you’re really feeling deep inside.

“Just like a single cell, the character of our lives is not determined by our genes but by our responses to our environmental signals that “— Bruce H Lipton

Let me share with you what I’ve learnt along the way in terms of embracing the ‘letting go’ process.

Firstly be nice to yourself!

If you’ve never done any sort of healing work before, I’d love for you to do something I didn’t when I started. Please be nice to yourself. You are so deserving and worthy. Treat yourself as you would a friend.

Be gentle and kind as you commence any healing journey. In my experience the nicer you are to yourself, the easier it is to surrender into a challenge. Often if you are open to a healing process, are gentle with self and can accept what arises, the intense moments of your healing can be fast-tracked somewhat.

Allow yourself to ‘feel all the feels’

In my clinical practice, I hear many clients tell me they avoid feelings. They worry about having them, and some even fear feeling all the feels. Our society has us afraid of feelings such as grief, anger, disappointment, or sadness. When we’re experiencing a fear of feeling or fear of expressing that emotion, our natural human tendency is to avoid it.

This avoidance of connecting with your emotions has a direct effect on your ability to process what you are experiencing and then let that emotion go.

**DISCLAIMER**

There is an important disclaimer when visiting the feelings department. If you become consumed with the emotions and your tools of choice are not beneficial, please do seek medical intervention immediately. Allowing any feeling or negative thought to perpetuate beyond a two week period allows for chronic and subconscious patterns to be created.

Allow yourself the ‘conscious mind catch’

Set your intention daily to surrender to ordinary thinking. Ordinary thinking is based on your old set of beliefs and way of life, which is what you’re wanting to change — right?

This intention is a powerful one, as it triggers your conscious brain to pay attention to where you’re deviating away from your journey path. This could be in thought, feeling or action.

So when you become consciously aware, allow yourself to have that experience. No reprimand, blame, shame or guilt. Simply allow as this opens an acceptance door of “I do that and now I recognise this doesn’t serve my highest good”.

Recognise a thought or language which no longer resonates with where you want to be heading (ie positive). Utilise the phrase “reframe that” or Gabby Berstein’s “choose again”. This statement said out loud is your commitment to self that you’ve consciously caught the negative thing you’ve been chasing, and your intention is to now let it go and reframe it with something positive.

Be advised, that when you start using this technique if can feel a somewhat depressing with what feels like constant reframing. Set your intention now to congratulate yourself on being a good goalkeeper and reframing as much as possible! Remember to be kind to self!

Journal out the feels

Unlike the movie Bridgette Jones never actually journaled. She ridiculed herself, She judged. She self hated in most of her diary entries. All she was really doing was invalidating herself with a list of her daily failures. Whilst those movies were hilariously funny, I was always panged with sadness as I watched her wallow in her emotional stuff.

When we are triggered, our brain in all its brilliance doesn’t actually know reality from historical experience. Your brain, at a subconscious level, will cross-reference your feelings from your original stress encounter, or even your inherited genetic response to stress, and provide you with the corresponding feelings.

See how easy it is to become stuck in all the stuff unless you deal with it?

By writing out the negative thoughts and feelings, you’re actually letting go of all the yuk that you have been storing inside of your mind. The actual task of writing out the emotion manually, as opposed to typing is the key here.

Bang a Pillow

Still, feeling a little stuck with anger or frustration? Here’s a tip I share with small people in my clinical space.

When you’re feeling Cranky Franky, take yourself away from everybody around you. Go to a safe place like your bedroom.

Grab a pillow and pound the mattress with just the pillow. You might surprise yourself with the sudden intensity that arises or how physical this exercise can get. That’s ok. The key here is a pillow and not someone's face! A boxing bag works just as well, but unless you know how to punch properly you can hurt yourself.

Utilise ‘Bush Flower Essences’ for support

Flower Essences are a liquid remedy which their use dates back to ancient Egypt to achieve emotional balance. There is evidence of their extensive use in the middle ages, as well as Paracelsus in the 15th century.

Fifty years ago, Dr Edward Bach rediscovered Flower Essences using English plants and shrubs. Here in Australia, we’re fortunate enough to have an indigenous culture who perpetuated the use of Australian Bush Flowers.

The modern founder, Ian White, remarks that Australia has the highest number of flowering plants, which are the oldest, and most metaphysically potent in the world. Our continent has a very wise old energy associated with it.

In his book “Australian Bush Flower Remedies”, Ian White states “the purpose of Bush Essences, is to assist in clearing blocks that stop an individual getting in touch with their true higher self, their intuition which knows their life purpose”.

Over several decades, Ian has formulated various blends of Australian Bush Flower Essences. Emergency Blend is exceptional for easing distress, fear, and panic. It can provide calm during a crisis. This particular remedy can be administered every hour or more frequently if necessary until the person is feeling better.

Heart Meditation

I adore heart space meditation. It can be short and sweet or as long as you are comfortable. Regular daily practice enables you to switch off the monkey chatter, connect with your breath and step down into your heart space.

Your heart is where your intuition connection resides. It’s the portal doorway to your higher self. It’s your love centre. What better place within yourself is there?

Submerse in the tub

Our bodies are made up of approximately 60% water. So immersing your body into water supports the arising of any trapped emotional blockages. I’ve had many a beautiful cry in the bath.

Often I’m chilled out listening to meditative music and I can release with breath. If the feels are intense, I honour their release with liquid love via the eyes. I find bath time releases are much more gentle on the body, and any subsequent fatigue from a physical release is rarely felt if I’ve done it in water.

Final words

We all have stuff. We wouldn’t be human without it. How you choose to acknowledge and process your stuff is a deeply personal and private affair. I often recommend a variety of tools for clients to attempt in order to gain experience whilst they are in a crisis or challenge. This experience provides direct evidence to the person of what does and doesn’t work for them, in their way and on their terms.

Again if you’re continuing to feel ‘out of sorts’ or stuck, seek professional support.

Karen Humphries is a Kinesiology Practitioner, Health & Business Coach, self-confessed laughaholic, and now Breast Cancer Advocate residing in Gippsland Victoria Australia. She loves being of service to the world with her humorous and positive approach to life, encouraging people to ‘choose to change and bloom from within.’ Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, and Linkedin.