Don’t Argue Over Principles

Summary

The article advises against arguing over principles, especially when dealing with individuals who disregard social norms and laws, suggesting it's better to prioritize safety and peace over being right.

Abstract

The author of the article emphasizes the importance of recognizing when to stand up for principles and when to avoid conflict, particularly with those who do not respect common courtesies or legal obligations. Using vivid examples, such as a driver who refuses to yield at a crosswalk or a confrontation on public transportation over mask-wearing, the author illustrates the potential risks of insisting on one's rights in the face of unreasonable behavior. The article underscores the value of choosing one's battles wisely, advocating for a pragmatic approach to conflict that prioritizes personal well-being and the avoidance of unnecessary escalation. It also touches on the impact of social media in exacerbating such conflicts and the potential for viral notoriety and legal consequences.

Opinions

Arguing over principles is often righteous but can lead to trouble when the other party does not play fair.
Upholding the law and principles is important, but not at the expense of one's safety or well-being.
It is more sensible to avoid confrontation with individuals who blatantly disregard traffic laws or social norms, even if it means yielding.
The potential consequences of standing one's ground, such as physical harm or viral embarrassment, are not worth the principle at stake.
In the current social media-driven culture, public confrontations can quickly escalate and lead to severe repercussions, including job loss and police intervention.
It is advisable to remain calm and not let provocative individuals trigger emotional responses, as this can prevent a situation from becoming worse.
The article suggests that maintaining composure and letting go of minor disagreements is a wiser approach to navigating daily interactions.

If the other guy isn’t playing fair, it will only add to your trouble

So many of us love to argue over and fight for principle. Hey, slow down, buster— I have the right of way! I was here first! Hey, what do you think you’re doing? — Wait your turn like everyone else!

All good things. In many cases, righteous. The right of way and so on. The trouble starts when we cross paths with those weirdo humanoids who fail to practice good manners, including those principles.

It always happens at the wrong time. About to cross the street, when you notice that the oncoming car isn’t slowing down. In many cases, it’s not just principle — it’s the law. He has to slow down and let you cross.

What if he doesn’t? By the gauge of his speed, he decides to accelerate, beating your feet from the curb to the street. I know what you’re thinking. He has to stop. It’s the law. Great stuff — I’m with you. Again, what if he doesn’t?

You might wind up with principle, even the law on your side, but is it worth it? Imagine that he hits you. Yup, right there in the crosswalk. In plain sight of all the witnesses. The sky cameras too. Don’t forget the countless cellphone videos to boot. We all saw it with our own eyes and smartphones too — even as you’re doing snow angels on the sidewalk while going viral — all in real-time.

Whenever I’m on the curb, and I encounter these psychopaths, I remain on the curb. All I could envision, besides the law, principle, and now sympathy, are the multiple surgeries and years of physical therapy.

Yes, an extreme example, but sensible.

Don’t argue principles, don’t argue to win. Instead, fight your way out of this situation. Whether it is something trivial, like the self-checkout line at the supermarket, or that crazy lunatic behind the wheel. You know the one. The person with the Kids on Board stickers plastered all over their back and side windows. Look out for my children, but the heck with you and yours! Zoom-on, baby!

Just this week, I rode the express bus on my way to work. Some crazy dude started in with a woman for lowering her K-95 mask to apply lipstick.

Words were exchanged, tempers flared. Others got involved as voices were raised, and threats ensued. Accusations of racism and misogyny wrapped in political and manhood banter followed. It got ugly fast. No fisticuffs, but a healthy reminder: Let things go — in the end, it’s not worth it.

Especially in today’s social media culture and climate. I’m sure one or a few commuters whipped out a cellphone and recorded the exchange. The next thing you know, the police are involved and people are losing their jobs.

You know the rest of this sad, unnecessary, and unfortunate story. We know how it goes.

Never let a bad seed trigger your emotions. Be vigilant for sour moments that could escalate into a day from hell. Let that jerk cut the line and justify it to themselves. It says more about them than it does about us.

When I got off the bus that recent day, I headed for a Covid test. My industry has been very vigilant about the virus, its spread, and protocols. And guess what? The same old stuff I was talking about, baited me up to reel me in.

I was accused of cutting the check-in line by a person who claimed they arrived before me. Hogwash. I showed up 10–15 minutes before them. Matter-of-fact, I was sitting in a chair while watching them walk in.

Since I’m not a decision-maker, I let the person spew their dysfunction. If the people in charge and running the show knew there was a problem, they would have stepped in. Instead, the woman at the registration table looked up at me and rolled her eyes. Case closed.