Do You See Things as Black & White?
Maybe you are choosing an easier way out
This or that.
Right or wrong.
There is no in-between, or is there?
Time and again, we, ‘the humans’ have found ourselves debating over the “absolute”. Everything is supposed to rest at extreme ends and for some of us, the portion in-between does not simply exist.
You either want to do something or you don’t.
You either like something or you don’t.
You either love someone or you don’t.
But are things really as simple as that?
You and I both know, “no” is the answer.
Why then, do some of us choose to ‘ignore’ what lies between the extremes?
I was recently told by someone, “When you are dealing with me, please keep things as black or white”.
“I am not a complex person and I would appreciate it if you’d keep things simple for me.”
Why not?
Clearly, there exists a grey portion which that person chooses to blatantly IGNORE. Why go through the pains of mushing it all up, ha!
Sometime back, someone else told me a similar thing, “I don’t understand your emotions. It is so freaking impossible to know what you are feeling, when, and why!”
“There’s ALWAYS something with you, isn’t there?”
There I was, failing miserably at explaining how I was feeling and why because —
- I chose to not sound “accusive”
- I chose to not make my expectations clear and explicit and sound “greedy”.
- I chose to “understand” the other person and didn’t say a word until I could no longer hold it in.
- I chose to keep my expectations “situational”.
That is me. That is how I talk or express myself and I get it that you don’t understand because you don’t see things and behaviors as I do. You are not at the receiving end of ‘manipulative’ behavior and so how would you know what I am talking about.
You may be a swift talker and you can change your excuses every time a gun comes pointing at you, but that is not who I am.
I am someone who is highly driven by emotions and sometimes it is a challenging trait to live with.
As much as I care about my emotions, I will care about yours too, no matter how mean you are to me. I wouldn’t want to hurt you even when time and again, you’ve hurt me. I am not a saint. I get angry and furious and see my heart shatter into a million pieces, over and over again but guess what — my emotions give me the strength to endure that pain.
Is there a correlation between the two? (Between being emotional and choosing to see things in extremes)
Black and white is a perception. It is a way we see things/life in ‘absolutes’ or ‘extremes’.
You can run away all you want from complexities, but sooner or later you will find yourself in one, and then you will know why it was important to think in the grey.
I am an emotional empath and so I will always have my reasons. They will not make sense to you, does not mean they don’t exist.
This is something that I wanted to share.
It was highlighted to me many times before that I fail to see a clear picture because I surround myself with possibilities, reasons, and emotions. My tendency to perceive things sensitively coupled with a heart loaded with emotions portrayed me as someone without a basis, a logic. I ended up lingering in the grey, but not making sense to anyone.
Until now, I thought it was me. I know I am less practical but I was almost convinced I am not logical too. But there is no such established correlation.
Extremely emotional persons can view things as black and white and highly logical people can be smart enough to evaluate what stays in the grey and then make a judgment.
Exactly, I am now of the opinion that you are in fact smarter if you linger in the grey as against being ignorant if you chose the extremes. As plain as it is, you can not be on one side without ignoring the other.
There will always be a reason, up for your consideration.