Do What You Fear

Throughout our lives, we have always been complacent doing the same thing every single day. Sure, we might do the odd different thing, trip or event that breaks us out of our comfort zone and, how does it feel? Sometimes not great and the other times it’s fantastic. It’s not the outcome that’s important, it’s the simple fact that we got the courage to attempt what was outside of ourselves, something different.

As I was laying on my couch about 30 minutes ago, I had a realization that came to my head. It hit me like a freight train. It rushed through every cell in my body. It all made sense to me. What made sense, Alexander? Well, I will explain. I tried to encapsulate the feeling I had into words and this is what I came up with,

“What you fear is what you have to do”

A couple of days ago, I wrote a Medium post titled, “My Journey Into the Unknown-Ayahuasca”. It is a very special moment in my life. It was an experience unlike anything I will ever come to realize. When people see or hear “Ayahuasca”, they automatically assume drug, psychedelic and/or spiritual. Sure, maybe it’s all one in the same but, for me, it was deeply personal and the greatest learning experience. Go check it out.

I did not want to share my experience. It’s for me. It’s personal. No one else needs to know what happened and, that’s true. It was and is very personal but, I had the urge to share it. Whether people resonate with it or not, I wrote about it because I knew that’s what I needed to do.

I finished writing the post based on 100% true events and, was happy I did. It took me all day to do, with writing and editing I spent about six hours total on it. I took my time and tried to convey every detail that occurred. I even went back into the journal I had written in while I was there to revisit key words, descriptions and how I felt.

Two nights ago, the day I had completed the Medium post about Ayahuasca, I wanted to share it with my parents. I wanted to send the link to them and offer the opportunity to understand what I had gone through in Peru. Instead of sending it to both of my parents, I sent it to my mom. The thing you should know about my parents is that, my mom is the compassionate and understanding one whereas my dad is the linear and knowledgable one. When I think about it, the perfect balance. I’m not suggesting that my mom is up in the air and out of this world, she is just much more understanding of me, what I go through and what I want. They are both supportive but, to give you an example of how she thinks, she said last year, “You could be a kite flier for a living and as long as it made you happy, I wouldn’t care”. Do you better understand why I sent her the post and not my dad?

This morning, I was laying in bed (it seems like all my great ideas come from laying down) and I had a flash of understanding, “Why did I not send the article to my dad?” Was I afraid? Afraid of what, what he was going to say? Who cares. Even if his response was not something I wanted to hear, why am I drawing a picture of what the outcome could look like? Maybe he will like the article. Maybe it will touch his heart in a way I or he didn’t understand. So, right then and there I sent him the article. He has not read it yet and said he will later on when he has some time (everyone is quarantined and he’s self-employed, what future time presents a better opportunity?). LOL. Dad…

The feeling I had after I sent him the link cannot be described. A simple task completed. What effort did it take? None. The biggest effort was writing and editing the post. Here, I had shared the post with thousands on Medium and my mom but, not with my dad for the “fear” of rejection or him not understanding.

As mentioned, prior to writing this article I was laying on my couch. I had just coined the phrase, “what you fear is what you have to do”. I said to myself, “how can I write this post and expect people to believe my words if I only follow it sometimes?”, I can’t. I quickly got up, grabbed my laptop, opened it up and here I am, writing this. Life was giving me a hint, lay on the couch (comfort zone).or do what you fear, get up and start writing.

Life presents hints on what we should do every single moment of our lives. What are those hints? Easy. When our minds say, “You shouldn’t go for it”, do it. In the words of the infamous gigantic organization Nike, “Just do it”. Very true words to live by. So applicable to everything we do.

Now, I’m not saying get off your couch and go skydiving, or maybe you should. Who knows? The point I am trying to make is that when you think of a task, going out with your spouse for a walk, taking the initiative on a project at work, get to the gym, eat healthier, etc, if your mind says what’s easier, go for what’s harder, what you fear. The sense of accomplishment that you derive from doing something you fear cannot be explained, only felt by you.

Fear is the best word to describe what is hard to do because in reality, you do fear it, I know I do. Stepping outside of our comfort zones is….fearful. We all do what we know we can do, what we can do with greatness or are used to. “Yeah, I know how to eat this cake, I’ve been doing it for years”, “my marriage is fine, it doesn’t need to be spiced up”, “as long as I do my job at work, I’ll continue getting paid”. Sound familiar? Spice up your own life by doing what you fear. Your inner voice is telling you what to do! It’s screaming and yelling, “DO THIS. DO THIS!” and we choose to lay low. Sometimes it tells us in weird ways but, just listen.

Each fearful thought is an opportunity to do something different. To be a better version of ourselves. Hell, as I write this post I’m feeling better and better because I could have just laid on the couch and done nothing but, I did something, I did what I feared.

Forget Call to Action. Everyone does that on here. Do whatever you want. Keep living the same lives, no hard feelings. I get it. I did for so many years and I know for some things I will continue to do it but, for other things, I will do what I fear. I will do what was unthinkable for myself and step out of my comfort zone.

Thank you so much for reading. You have no idea how much it means to me when I see the “Read” column increasing under Stats on Medium. If my fans increase, even better! The best thing I love is receiving honest, heart-felt responses and emails from you. They mean the world to me and are an inspiration to keep writing. Step out of your comfort zone and do what you fear.

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