Do We Compete in Wrong Ways? #8
Competition Is Usually Healthy, but We Need to See Who or What We Are Competing Against, and Compete in Correct Ways.
This is a satire, negative song I wrote. The articles transpose negatives into positives. Click here to read all the lines of the song.
Few of us are completely satisfied with our life status. Satisfaction is often not attained, so we want more. Often, happiness is defined in terms of what we DON’T have: “If I only had THAT…” that thing or that person.
If we’re broke, we think having more money will make us happy. But there are lots of stories about rich people who commit suicide. At least if they become sick, they learn money can’t always buy them health. Money doesn’t hold the magical cure many of us think it should. So we look for more ‘pots of gold.’
Competition is often produced by envy (one of those 7 deadly sins). We have envy for something, like getting one or more of our needs met, and this becomes like our main focus: getting our needs met. Sometimes we compete to get our needs met when we should be meeting the needs of someone else.
Six Human Needs Dominate Us
Actually, there are 7 needs we have, but the last one is for believers in the things of God only. I’ll save it until the end. But the first 6 needs are as follows.
(1) Security. We need to be secure in relationships and in our livelihood. God meets this need in us by giving us absolute total assurance of salvation, if we believe his gospel and trust him.
(2) Spontaneity. We must be free, and at liberty to be ourselves, and to be accepted for who we are. We also need variety in life, even to the point of risk at times. Security is number one, but it must be balanced with this need. God meets this need in us by giving us the freedom to be ourselves, and to relate to him in the spirit, and not by laws, precepts, and principles like existed in the Old Testament. He allows us to live in faith and develops confidence in us.
(3) Significance. We all need what psychology calls ‘self-worth.’ We all need to feel valuable. If we don’t at least have security (need number 1) in our close relationships, then this need is not being met. God meets this need by giving us his grace and love. Jesus even says he gives us his glory, but it’s something we can’t see with our eyes. When we look in the mirror, we should see ‘the glory of the Lord,’ according to Paul. I usually only see Roger.
(4) Love. Actually, this is where our needs focus starts and should be our goal for others. Our goal should be to live in love, which is the great command of Jesus. So, this should be #1. But the truth is unless we have the first three needs met, we really can’t experience or give love. God meets this need for us by giving us his unconditional eternal love. He doesn’t make us work for it or earn it. It is a free gift. But we can only truly receive his love if we’re assured of our salvation, which was talked about in the first need: security.
(5) Increase. If we are not growing and maturing, we are dying. There is really no stagnancy in life. We need positive movement — betterment — or we are decreasing and fading. Thus, we must have goals and priorities, and purposes as we talked about. This is true of both individuals and marriages. God meets this need with his gospel. It is what gives us increase by the good gospel seed he sows and plants into us, producing good results. This is what increases growth in God’s Kingdom. This is what flows into us, empowering us to love others and relate to them as we should.
(6) Overflow. We must see ourselves as here to make a contribution to the lives of others, if only our spouse, kids, or a close friend. We need to help lift others ‘to higher ground,’ as John Denver used to say. It is our job to help and edify and encourage and listen to others. The Bible sees this as us ‘overflowing’ onto them. God meets this need by giving us his Holy Spirit, and by giving us all his Kingdom blessings and benefits. This then allows us to impact others with the presence and power of all of his Kingdom. Jesus says, “You have freely received, so freely give.”
Making Sure Needs Are Met
As I said, we all have these needs. None of us are excluded. We need them met in our lives, and we need to meet them in the lives of others, especially those closest to us.
The extent these needs are met in us, or in others who are close to us, there are problems. They should be met at least at a 6 level on a scale of 1–10. The level should actually be higher. If they are not met, there is inappropriate behavior and response. There will be problems.
A Chat with The Gospel Life Coach
I’ve mentioned God in all these because it’s important to see how God first meets our needs. God is always the giver. We always receive, and then we are meant to respond with what we receive. If we don’t live this way, life doesn’t flow very smoothly. There are too many bumps if needs are not met.
There is also a 7th need I mentioned for those in God and spiritually minded.
(7) Identity. God gives us everything we have in this need. Only God gives this need. God sees believers as he does Jesus, with all of his righteousness, glory, love, and everything else. “As Jesus is, so are we in this world.” … “As the Father loves me, so he loves you.”
Paul even uses the phrase, “We put on Christ.” It’s like we have a spiritual Jesus costume that we wear, at least in the eyes of God. In one letter he calls it the armor of God. It’s God’s armor, not our armor. So, in the spirit world, angels and demons don’t know if it is us in there or God.
It is living here that we know God’s love the most, and know he not only forgives but forgets our sin. It’s a big hurdle for the non-spiritual mind to grasp because we know that God is all-knowing.
Besides, we know that we don’t do this. We have memories like an elephant, especially if someone does us wrong. If God is all-knowing, then how can he forget our sin? It’s just one of the divine attributes he has that we don’t have. This is why Christians are called ‘believers,’ and not ‘understanders.’