Do Not Be Jealous, For You Don’t Know What They’ve Been Through
a poem and some disagreement
I used to be jealous of skinny, beautiful models plastered across social media; yet the more I learned, the more I realized how dysfunctional this life can be, counting calories, shedding weight, a fear of losing your livelihood over simple human bodily changes. I am no longer jealous (or envious if you must be precise), for I am not interested in putting in that effort, and can admire from afar those who have committed to do this, and are continually trying to do so in a healthy way.
I am still envious of what people do with privilege.
I am still envious of what additional things others have gotten from simply existing, who then through fundamental attribution error attribute their own success to effort, and my “failure” as a lack thereof; I am envious because there wasn’t a difference in effort placed into this journey.
In fact, I’ve placed 3x the effort to receive 0.5x the results.
Sometimes, the solution is to depart, build your own space instead of being envious of a space that’s set up for your failure unless you sacrifice every living, breathing moment dedicated to becoming someone’s “hustle porn”.
[Look at her! If you simply sacrifice every aspect of yourself to fit to some norm set out by some group then you, too, can be successful!]
I am envious not because envy is a bad emotion but because it highlights a need that springs forth from inequality. I am only envious; think hard about how others can be frustrated, angry for the length and level of unfairness- anger: an emotion of amplification of need for justice. equality.
So for each instance of envy, or jealousy I examine: is there a piece of story that I may be missing? I try to be empathetic. Yet I set boundaries on this narrative that all that happens is down to individual hustle, effort, motivation, dedication, as systems make it nearly impossible for some at the peak and a half of their effort, motivation, dedication to achieve half of what others are boosted to achieve.
Some edit for tone, thinking that any display of emotion is unprofessional not knowing how to manage emotions in the first place, or invalidating a message because of how it’s portrayed not realizing that envy, frustration and anger are all highlight the same message after all.
#WritingPrompt: how do you manage envy or jealousy? Do you distinguish between the two?
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Hi, I’m Lucy Dan 蛋小姐 (she/her/她) and I’m starting to realize that all of my poems have this “here are multiple scenarios to which I would apply [life rule insert here] and here are some that I would not.” That’s my whole poetry genre. That and food poetry.