Disowning Our Inner Voice

I think we all understand what our inner voice is. It’s the verbalizing we think in. That voice we talk inside our head with, that voice that too often occupies our attention relentlessly, dominating our thinking place. So it’s a subtle point to think that we are not that voice. That voice is a feature of us, it is not us. It does not define us.

I’m sure these concepts will feel foreign, maybe absurd, to some people. I can only offer my naked truth and the results of my searching. I’m positive that anyone who cares to look, to explore faithfully, we’ll find the same results. This is not a statement of my arrogance or confidence, it’s based on the nature of how we’re built. That inner voice is learned. That alone should help us to understand that it is not an inherent part of who we are. It is acquired, like habits, memories, opinions, and assessments. In fact, that’s the very graveyard that our inner voice draws from. But that’s a topic for another day.

None of this is to dismiss the content of the inner voice. And, it’s also not to validate the content of the inner voice. I merely want to demystify it. And by demystifying it, empower you to leverage it as you wish.

As I trust Dear Reader can see, our inner voice is learned. We often repeat things to ourselves that others have said to us. That’s a simple example of how our inner voice learns what to say. And, whatever can be learned, can be modified. And, please know, it will not be a coincidence if your inner voice changes and your behavior, your feelings, your results in life change as well. This is not confirmation that you are your inner voice. It’s only showing that our inner voice can greatly shape our experience of life.

Pretend that your inner voice is an omniscient roommate offering candid commentary to your life. As with any commentator, they are bringing their own perspective, their own biases, and borrowing on their individual experience. And like anyone else, they’re fallible, they’re going to make mistakes, they’re going to get things wrong, they’re going to make things up. So while their narrative may be convincing, or their assessments may ring true, we mustn’t give ourselves over mindlessly to what they say.

This is a dialogue, not a monologue. We have the agency to shape our inner voice. And, like with anyone else, some of these assessments and opinions will be deeply engrained. Anyone that has attempted discourse on the internet, or in person, will recognize how resistant some people are to shifting their opinions, to changing how they talk about some things. Our inner voice is no different. You may feel like you’re on such good terms with your inner voice that merely making a suggestion will be sufficient. It rarely is. But don’t lose heart, your inner voice can be trained. The first step is simply understanding that *that voice* is not you, and doesn’t define you.

Don’t believe everything you think.

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