Discover Your Emotional Freedom

How to let go and find your power

“Energy doesn’t lie. Keep sensing it, trusting it, letting it liberate you.” ― Judith Orloff, M.D.

Up until last year, I was unaware of how entangled I was with the emotions of others. When you are an empath, it can be challenging to sort out what feelings are yours.

Because I grew up as a sibling of someone with a mental illness, I always tried to help everyone in my family feel better. I allowed myself to become enmeshed in their emotions.

When I had the opportunity to step back, I realized I had lost myself. From that place, I could not serve others with love and compassion. It was time to find my emotional freedom.

I am grateful I had the opportunity last year to get quiet, stay still, and move through my feelings one by one.

It was an exercise in removing myself from situations to rediscover who I am at the core of my being. This process never truly ends, but I feel closer to my true self than ever before.

To stay quiet and go within, I take daily nature walks. Slow walking meditation helps me go inwards for answers.

For me, movement is my solace. It allows me to ground myself to the Earth, connect with my inner being, and review my emotions all while my body moves.

Each day, I can clear more of the emotions away that do not belong to me. It is this daily practice that brings me back to myself.

Here are three ways you can start this process towards emotional freedom for yourself.

Notice when you feel the most peace:

I feel very peaceful, especially when I walk by myself in our garden. Nature gives me the peace I need to free up my heart to be of service to myself and others.

I notice that if I spend too much time indoors, I go back into my mind. Thoughts race around in my head and cloud my emotions.

As soon as I go outdoors, my mind quiets, and my heart speaks. It is where I can gain freedom as a human being, feeling my way through life.

In working outdoors and tending to my garden, I can work through my emotions and issues. Nature and plants are my therapy.

It is the slowing down of the mind by quiet noticing that brings me to peace. I touch each leaf on a plant, gently speak to it and allow the calmness of the moment to wash over me.

Even trimming back dead branches or yellowing leaves is an exercise in letting go of my emotional attachments. With each part of the plant I cut, I cut away the emotions that no longer serve me.

Pulling weeds gets to the root of my soul. Each one that I remove from my garden has a similar effect on my heart. By uprooting weeds, I allow plants I want to keep more room to flourish. In this way, my own emotions have more room to grow.

Take time by yourself:

In my family, there were always many gatherings. Up until last year, we spent a lot of time together. I never had long periods on my own to figure out who I was.

I always felt I needed to be there with everyone, even if I did not feel like it. It was my choice, but I did not allow myself the option.

Because I was attached to the emotions of my family, I felt I had to be there.

Now I know it is more than okay to take plenty of time to myself. To treat others with compassion and love, I must find a place for myself first.

Each day, I take a minimum of an hour to myself every day. My routine varies, but it always includes a walk outside, some gardening, and rest with a cup of tea. These activities are very soothing and nurturing.

In the afternoons, I make myself a cup of loose leaf tea. As I let the tea steep, I look outside at the garden for a few moments and feel appreciation for nature.

Once my tea is ready, I sit down with it and feel the warmth around my hands. This quiet noticing is another form of meditation for me.

If it is a cold day, I make sure to wrap myself in a warm, soft blanket. It feels as if I am closer to my own emotions this way. I look around the room slowly and thoughtfully, taking in my surroundings for about 15 minutes. I remind myself I am safe, loved, and held by life.

How can you take some time to yourself to allow your emotions to detach from others?

Allow yourself to communicate differently:

It is paramount to discover how to communicate with others in a way that feels best to you.

There are some family members I only write letters or texts to at this time. I need time, distance, and space to rediscover who I am so that I can open my heart more to them.

At the beginning of the pandemic, I had some phone and video calls with my parents. However, these calls made me feel more entangled with their emotions. I knew I needed to communicate differently.

I began to remember how we wrote each other letters and cards in 1991 when I spent a year abroad in Mexico.

Writing has always been my best way of communicating, especially when I need to speak my truth. I can write from my heart when I write with pen and paper. It slows down my mind, and I can think more clearly and with intention.

For about six months, I have exchanged letters, cards, and care packages with my parents. It has been a beautiful experience, as each of us can come out and say what is in our hearts.

Each day through writing, walking meditation, and my daily tea breaks, I am building up my spirit into someone who can handle the powerful emotions of others in any situation. I know that I am in the process of becoming a new version of myself so that I can love others exactly as they are.

To discover my power, strength, and emotional freedom, I can let go and know I have to walk my path. In creating boundaries, I can show more love. It allows everyone to have their space to grow.

Just like when you plant a garden, you do not want to crowd your plants too much. They need space to grow their roots and reach for the sunlight.

Human beings need space to grow their hearts.

How can you communicate in a way that allows space for you to grow?

Do you have a story of emotional growth and freedom? Please share in the comments. I appreciate you!