Did Your Cave Dwelling Relatives Set You Up For Failure?

Evolution moves slower than glaciers. Society speeds along.

I was the new guy.

And the new guy gets tested.

Growing up, my family moved. Time and time again. Traveling from oil boom to oil boom, domestically and internationally. I attended 12 schools before I popped on the cap and gown and graduated.

Most schools had an area in the back of the playground where everyone goes to fight. Usually these fights resulted in a little pushing, some name-calling, and a few wild punches, with everyone then falling down and rolling around on the ground.

Shirts were torn. Friends were made.

I learned to adapt. Fitting in meant following the rules of the group and enduring any local initiation rites. It was important to be accepted, to become “liked”, useful even.

You just wanted to be cool or at least for others to think you’re cool. But it’s just your inner cave-dwelling relatives screaming, “ Like me, Like me, please.”

We’re tribal. And 50,000 years ago, as we wandered across the savannah, we had a chance to live if the group accepted us. If not, we died. Our tribe kept us safe, and fed, and warm, with a chance to reproduce.

A chance to multiply.

Without our tribe we became Saber Tooth tiger food.

50,000 years ago our biology, our society, and our social structure kept pace with each other. Our bodies and our psyches were aligned with our tribal values.

Society began to speed up. And our bodies did not. Our thoughts did not.

Today our society is sprinting ahead like a cocaine-fueled hare with no finish line in sight. And our obsession with being liked, fitting into the group, and making sure others like us — which was essential 50,000 years ago — is now a danger to our mental health, our progress as a human, and as a society.

And it’s not just this obsession with being liked.

Our cave-dwelling ancestors walked and ran and climbed 10–12 kilometers a day. We were active. Our bodies were designed to move and be physical.

But we were active for a purpose.

We moved for better shelter. We moved for food. We moved to protect ourselves. We didn’t move for fun. If action wasn’t needed we rested. We conserved our energy. If you ran out of energy you got left behind, or killed, or eaten, and then killed.

Given a choice between the stairs and the escalator, you take the escalator. It saves energy. Having problems getting up at 5 am to go work out? Blame your ancient relatives. They conserved their energy.

This is perfect for a human on the move but not so much for someone that sits in front of a computer all day. Our bodies weren’t designed to be sedentary. Maybe one day, 50,000 year from now, our bodies will have evolved to stay healthy as we sit in cubicles and crunch numbers but for now you will have to fight through your base instincts, get yourself up, and go workout.

Our vision evolved to see long distance. We needed to know what was coming. If you’re stressed walk outside and look at the horizon. Let your vision widen. You will immediately feel less stressed and your heart rate will slow. This is evolutionary. Ancient hunters needed to see far distances for food, and shelter and to be aware of any approaching dangers. Viewing a wide open expanse is calming because it calmed our ancestors.

But not so great for reading, and scrolling on our phones, and doing detailed minute work. Hence myopia abounds. Our eyes are yet to catch up with our lifestyles.

We evolved to gossip. It was important to know who was sleeping with whom, who was plotting against the leadership, and who might be on the way out. Know all of the tribe’s political machinations and you could make better decisions on who to befriend.

This could be the difference between life and death.

Today, it may feel like everyone is talking about you, but they’re not. It’s just not important. You’ll live.

How Do We Beat Evolution?

In the schoolyard when I was a kid I was concerned about fitting into the group. This is an external paradigm of life. I adjusted my behavior, if not my thoughts, to the external group, making sure that I didn’t deviate from the group’s norm. This is exactly what I would have done if I found myself alone on the savannah in my animal pelt with tigers and lions running around. I’d have adapted to the group.

Any group that would’ve welcomed me.

Today there is a group for anyone and anything. It’s dangerous. You may not have to worry about getting eaten by tigers but adapt to the wrong group and you will be devoured.

Now is the time to think with an internal viewpoint. We must have a personal vision of our own ethics and values before we venture onto the prairie. What does right and wrong mean to you? What guides your life? What values do you use to make decisions?

Research. Learn. Evolve.

We must look for a tribe that will support us and our values.

If you know your enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the results of a hundred battles. ~ Sun Tzu

Know yourself.

Research. Learn. Evolve. Internally.

Internal is authentic. Authentic is not in our nature. It takes courage.

Be brave.